Fall Of 1985

Inside

My P.O.V.
Mama F: (Behind them and cross; she doesn't like kids) What do you want? They are startled. They jump around to face her, gasping. Data: A glass of water. Mama F: (To Jake) Six waters. (To the boys and me) Is that all? Mikey: Ye... Data: Yes, yes. Mouth: (Acting like he's in a fine Italian restaurant) No! I want the Veal Scallopine... We wish that Mouth would just shut up for once. They are squeaking with anxiety, afraid to talk, and trying desperately to make him shut his big mouth by mime-zipping their mouths shut and turning the key. Mikey: (Tense whisper) (i squeezed mikey's hand tighter he pulled me to his side hugging him and he told me everythings gonna be all right shortstack i said ok ) Mouth...shut up! Mouth ignores them and continues. Mouth: ...I want the Fettucini Alfredo...a bottle of Fettucini, a 1981. (Kisses his thumb and forefinger like a gourmet) Mama Fratelli grabs him and holds him fast in a headlock, forcing his mouth open by pinching his cheeks. Mama F: The only thing we serve is tongue. She pops open a switchblade in her other hand. We all cover our mouths in terror. Mama F: You boys and girl like tongue? Ha ha ha ha, a ha ha ha. (Closes the switchblade and releases Mouth) That all? Mouth walks away relieved but just can't keep his big mouth shut. Mouth: Then again... Mikey: Mouth, shut up. We are still gasping from her shocking action. Mama F: (Shouts) Sit down! In panic, (im sitting on mikeys lap because theres not enough chairs) they hurriedly yank out the chairs from the table and sit down. Chunk falls over. Data wonders about the two "customers" he saw earlier. Data: You alright, Chunk? Chunk:Hey guys...  (Trying to tell what he knows) I know...I know... Data: What happened to the two guys in the polyester suits that came before us? What happened to them? Chunk: I know. Mikey: What, what is it? Spit it out. Chunk: You guys, if we don't get out of here soon, there's gonna be some...(scared) hostage crisis. Out in the garage, O..ORV, four wheel drive, bullet holes the size of... (panicking) Matzah Balls! Mouth: Chunk, I'm starting to O.D. on all your bullshit stories. Data: Yeah. Mikey, Data: Shut up. Mama Fratelli returns with six glasses of pale brown liquid. It's water, but probably rusty from old pipes or sitting in a dirty tank for several years. Mama F: (Scowling) There's your water! Data: Thank you, Sir, uh, Ma'am. Mikey: Thank you, Sir...(She looks at Mikey, who recoils) Oh, I mean, Ma'am. Mouth: (Holding his glass up to the light) This' supposed to be water? Mama F: It's wet, ain't it? (Angry) Drink it! Mikey changes the subject for two reasons: one, to avoid drinking the water, and two, to get downstairs in hopes of finding some hint of the rich stuff. Mikey: Miss, where's the men's room, please? Mama F: Can't you hold it? Mikey: No.