The Nostalgia Sense

Prologue + Chapter One

AUTHOR NOTE:

Just based on the prologue this is gonna seem like a super sad book but it won't be horrifically sad, no suicide or shit like that, you'll understand why she says what she says by the end. Just read it fr fr. 

I always thought I'd die young, young and violent like Dally from The Outsiders.

I thought I'd have a wild, untamed group of found family like Stevie from Mid90s..

I thought I'd have a burning love like Baby and Johnny from Dirty Dancing.

I always liked movies as a kid.

I thought a lot of things.

I used to sit on the floor with my brother, watch VHS tapes until the TV was scorching to the touch.

I always thought we were so sneaky when our Mom or dad would wake up and we'd quickly turn off the TV and lay flat under our blanket, quietly giggling to ourselves and kicking each other before hushing and trying to stay still so they wouldn't realize it was us and not just a blanket.

I always thought my movies would be a reality, a violent, stupid, wild & fun reality, but it never worked out quite like that.

I didn't die young and violent, I didn't have a stupid friend group that would stay with me for life, I didn't have a passionate summer love.

I did die, I did have friends, I did have love, but nothing epic, nothing to be remembered.

The most I remembered was my death.

They say when you die you relieve all your favorite Moments for five minutes but it didn't quite work like that for me.

Instead I re-lived everything I remembered, every little thing, even what I hated.

Chapter One. 1986.

I sat on the couch, knees folded into my chest and a Care Bears comforter from my bed wrapped tight around my body.

The little clock atop the TV read '12:36' and I knew it was far too late for me to be up.

My brother, Spencer, lay asleep beside me, hands folded tight around his pillow.

"Spencer." I whispered, pushing at his shoulder. "Spencer wake uppppp." I said firmer now.

Re-runs of 'I Love Lucy' played quietly in the background as I tugged at Spencer's pajama shirt.

He murmured slightly and kicked me before rolling over and burying his face into the sofa's leather seats.

"Ow, Spencerrr." I said smacking my hands against his back.

"No!" Spencer said, rolling onto his back and blinking at me.

I watched as he sat up and grabbed his glasses from the coffee table and slid them on before pushing me back by my shoulders.

"Spencer, stop it!" I whined.

"You're annoying Stella." He said as he sat down and looked at the TV, glowing softly in the dark room.

"You're infinity annoying!" I replied, the word fresh in my brain from school that morning.

"Kids?" I heard my mothers faint voice from the hallway. "Why are you up?"

I looked at Spencer, hearing Moms footsteps grow louder.

I grabbed my comforter and climbed off the couch as quickly as I could, scooching on my butt across the floor till I was behind the couch, Spencer following with his pillow clutched to his chest.

"Shhhhhh." I whispered, putting a finger to my mouth.

Spencer pushed me before shushing me back.

I smacked him back and he was about to speak when we saw our mothers legs by the coffee table.

She gave a loud yawn and we watched as she picked up the remote and clicked off the TV.

She paused and seemed like she was looking around before we heard her disappointedly click her tongue and tuck the remote into her pocket, leaving with it.

"All your fault." I whispered.

"No yours." Spencer replied as he pushed his glasses back up his nose.

Our Moms footsteps disappeared and we heard the click of her bedroom door.

I wrapped my blanket around me and scooched out from behind the couch, standing up and heading for my room, blanket dragging on the floor behind me.

I walked though the kitchen. Down the hall to the stairs.

I walked down, careful not to step on abandoned clothes, and got to my room, ducking in with Spencer just behind.

I threw my blanket just short of my mattress and had to run over, picking it up to actually put it on my bed.

"You're stupid Stella." Spencer said as he climbed our bunk beds ladder.

"NO! You are! Four eyes!" I said, sticking out my tongue at him.

"Four eyes is not a nice word Stella! I'm gonna tell Mommmmm!"

"That's mean." I said as I climbed into my bed and pulled my comforter tight around me.

Spencer just laughed as the whole bunk shook while he tried to get comfortable.

"Lay down!" I said, kicking the bottom of his bed.

"You're not Mom!"

"Lay down lay down lay down!" I repeated over and over, kicking his bunk as I yelled.

"You act like a baby Stella." He said as he finally stopped moving.

"No you do." I said, yawning as I spoke.

"Go to sleep." Spencer said, yawning too.

I mumbled a 'yes' and pulled my covers higher to keep out the winter chill.