Headphone On Reality Off: Life Is a Blockbuster

Blockbuster life

Life is a fucking blockbuster don't you think so ,from having to deal with family, friends, school ,stress, insecurities and just how much I hate my life at the moment .I just can't get it all out so am gonna tell you a story.
The name Cat short for Catherine at least that what my birth certificate says well no one really calls me that they just call my surname or address me according to which of my siblings they are familiar with . I had everything I could ever wish for well that was what I thought like it was all roses and no thorns well things just went downhill . I finished primary school and went into high school or secondary like we call it here well it was okay I guess , I wasn't exactly the top of the class but I never failed . I guess the attention wasn't just me . I was already used to being the shadow seriously I don't even know if I should classified myself as introvert or extrovert or maybe both as I tend to blend in with both category. Back to the story ,as a boarder life in school was okay I didn't lack anything well am always okay with what I had so I didn't see the need to ask for more .
Last year in school and I am still the same naive little girl , I saw my friends growing up and advancing but I wasn't growing , I didn't even know wat I was doing like I said blockbuster right .well school done and I was admitted into university against my better choice to learn something before entering the university ,guess my dad didn't like the ideas , he made all the choices for me ,the school, and other stuffs too ,I didn't even get to live at the school or around it which was really annoying as I had to come from home which is apparently a very long distance to my school well thank Daddy dearest for that.
At the university, I would consider myself timid, shy ..fill the rest of the words yourself. I had friends that I love but I just felt like something was missing , I have heard people saying how university changed them , how they grew up and learnt so many things but I guess that doesn't exactly apply to me cause I didn't have fun ,I didn't get to enjoy it cause it was all about school and studying , I didn't get to date well that was intentionally added , I didn't get to do anything apart from waking up in the morning and going school, coming back and repeat . thinking back I really missed my youth but there is no time travel so I can't get back and change anything . I spent 4 good years in school and nothing to show for it well apart from the certificate hilarious right .
First year in school was okay , I felt like I had come out into the world and I was excited to see it well I guess the world wasn't excited to see me because classes was over the top and hectic , we had classes , practicals and other stuff . Second year we went through the same thing just no practical . I wouldn't say I wasn't worried of cos I was but who was I going to tell . I did have fun too with my friends , they were really funny and nice ishhh but I love them okay but as an introvert I was used to getting stuck in my head , overthinking and overanalyzing everything. I was a strategic human being but only in my head 🫣😁😁.
I could create scenarios of a better life for my life and how I would have lived my life another way if I could change it . It was how I kept going , my stress level was already high but I learned to control it with music , whenever I was lost I would turn to my music and imagine my self in a better way well it worked but once those headphones were gone I would get up feeling fine and then remembering that it was reality I would go back to feeling like shit.
Third year in university and I was just praying to graduate and finally experience life don't forget my family is strict we practically had household rules that were untold and am guessing it applies practically to me than to my siblings . I was able to get through third year , my grade was okay and I was happy , I wasn't a straight A student but I was a failout either , I was doing my best and I was cool with it .
Finally the last year ,my fourth year was actually better than the rest of the years , I was super excited to get away from classes, waking up early for exams and staying up late to study ,it was so tiring and I was super eager to race out . Did I forget to say I was super broke in school , I didn't have money to spare apart from textbooks and fees"living the dream indeed" I never for once went to any party that was hosted by my school mates. My family didn't like the ideas so I guessed that was where I developed the phobia to blend in with people .it was always tiring for me to even answer a phone call that wasn't family or friends not to talk of dating that was so out of the question for me entirely . I don't think I will ever date if I continue to stay indoors which is what am still doing till now . Well back at my story , finally exams , I and my friends did our absolute best and left the rest for God cause I was so done with exams entirely. Our sign out was nice we all look good and I loved it I couldn't exactly invite anyone even if I wanted but I had my friends and that was enjoy for me .
The next part is where my life changes either for the best or the worst . Follow and like for more if you enjoyed it .