One Sided Feelings?

Chapter 4

12/25/08

It was Christmas. Different from other Christmas, Namjoo was alone. She was in her room, her face in a pillow. she was secretly crying but pretended to be asleep.

Usually, Sungjae would be waking her up by screaming 'MERRY CHRISTMAS NAMCHU AH!!' and doing aegyo. She waited and waited for Sungjae to do that but he never did, she thought that he would be outside her room. but no, he was nowhere.

Sungjae has been slowly drifting away from Namjoo nowadays. She didn't know if it's because of her classmates teasing her and him together but they didn't have school together for someone's sake.

"Maybe, he was so stupid that he forgot that it's our holiday vacation.. Or maybe he was with some other friends of his that was more important than me." Namjoo mumbled, feeling more tears coming.

Namjoo was feeling more and more insecure every minute. She went out of bed and tried smiling at the mirror but she felt more sad. She always force herself to smile. Even when Sungjae didn't went with her to buy something for her mom, where she looked like a fool, just standing and waiting there. Even when Sungjae started to not be with her when it's break, lunch or even going to school or back to their house.

Wait! Namjoo shook her head. I shouldn't be feeling like this! I should be happy for my family. I should get used to this as well. She suddenly danced around the room, to brighten up her mood. It was weird of her but she was always like that.

Then she suddenly changed her clothes, taking a bath a while ago. She washed her face and got outside before running to her mom that were in the kitchen and hugged her. "Merry Christmas~!!" her mom was shocked but hugged her back. Namjoo as well ran to her dad and hugged him as well. His dad patted her head.

Namjoo went to their big Christmas tree in the living room, that they made a week ago. "We should take a picture here together!" She said, smiling. Her parents were smiling and agreed. "Namjoo? Where is Sungjae? He didn't went here a while ago." Her mom said from the kitchen, making her smile go away. She furrowed her eyebrows and said, "I don't know."

"Oh, can you bring these cookies that I made for them though?" Namjoo sighed silently but nodded before 'smiling' again back to the kitchen. "Okay!" She got the jar of cookies and got some socks and wore them before wearing her sneakers. She grabbed her jacket and beanie before going outside.

She started to make her way in Sungjae's house. It was really cold outside, she didn't brought her gloves since she thought that it wouldn't be this cold. Being her stubborn self, she didn't minded to come back but kept walking.

After a while, she regretted not bringing her gloves. It was so cold. She walked faster until she finally went to Sungjae's house.

She doorbell-ed and was greeted warmly by Sungjae's mother who was smiling. "Hi, come in Namjoo." Namjoo didn't wanted to go inside since she didn't wanted to see Sungjae. So she made it quick. "Mom wanted me to give you this. I'm gonna do something so I wouldn't be able to hang around here more, sorry." She bowed and quickly turned away.

"Namjoo!" She heard him say. She started to walk faster, her hands in her jacket's pockets. "Yah, Namjoo ah." Sungjae held her shoulder before making her turn around.

"Where are you going? Aren't you gonna go and greet me 'Merry Christmas'?" He said, pouting. Namjoo was emotionless, she didn't know if she would be happy, sad, angry or whatever.

Sungjae, however, was kinda worried but didn't showed it. He knew that he was ignoring Namjoo for a while but he wanted to be alone for a while. Or just be with Joy.

"Aren't you gonna go come inside?" Namjoo was really furious now. "Well, aren't you gonna say sorry?" Sungjae was speechless, but looked down.

"S-sorry for what, namjoo ah?" He said, rubbing his nape. Namjoo shook her head and though she was being pale because it was really cold.

Namjoo just told him that she was just joking and she just really needs to go somewhere before chuckling and nodding. Sungjae nodded and went back to his house. 'I'm sorry Namjoo.'

'Am I that great of an actress, Sungjae?'

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Rawr.