~~Harlequin Angst Oneshot~~

The Nightmares..

I let out a sigh of annoyance, rolling my eyes as I yet again find the Green Menace sprawled out on my couch, eating my Hot Cheetos. "Quin.. this is the fourth time this week I've found you here in my house after work. What gives?" I ask, shrugging off my coat and sticking it on the coat hanger by the door. The green clown looks over, his apple green eyes giving me a onceover before shrugging and turning back to his K-Drama. I deadpan at his action, shaking my head and slipping my shoes off. "Fine, don't answer me. It's not like I care, or anything," I mutter, plopping down on my chair at my desk, pulling down my sketchbook from one of the shelves and beginning to draw. At least, that's what I planned to do, but I pause when I hear the familiar name of 'Jugyeong', one that only plays when The Harlequin is feeling down. I set my pencil down and look over at him, finally noticing his dull eyes and tired expression. I get up and walk over, standing behind him as he continues lounging. "Harley." 

"Hmm."

"Pause the show."

Harlequin lets out a sigh, pausing his show and finally turning to look at me properly. "Yes, my dearest?" He asks, his tone not holding the slight teasing edge to it anymore. I stare at him a moment, then move to the other side of the couch and sit next to him. "What happened..?" I ask, my voice quiet with a hint of worry to it. He pauses, eyes widening almost imperceptably. He looks away again, and I can almost hear the gears of lies turning in his head. "And don't think of lying to me, you only play 'True Beauty' when something happens to you. And yes, I do know that well." I say, causing the green bean to pause once more. He sits up, letting out a sigh as he leans forward to rest his arms on his knees. "You aren't gonna let this drop, are you?" He murmurs, scratching absentmindedly at his left forearm. I place my hand on his, intertwining my slender fingers with his sharp claws. "No, I'm not, because I know you too well than to think that you'll 'get over it' in a day or two. So tell me, what really happened? I want to help you." Silence fills the air, soft yet heavy. Then, he speaks. "I just.. I need a place to stay for the night. I don't want to go back to the circus.. well, for a bit." He chuckles, a dull, dry sound escaping his lips before he continues, quieter than before. "..I've been having nightmares recently. They.. scare me. Like, really scare me. And they always end the same. Always." 

Another silence fills the room, heavier than the last. The Harlequin glances over at me, his eyes trembling and his grip on my hand firm. I nod slightly at him, letting him know I'm still listening.

"They.. they sometimes start like a normal dream, other times just dive headfirst into it. More often the latter, honestly. They start with me doing a normal day of work at the circus, then shift into me cuddling with you in my tent or on your bed. Then.. Well, that's when it turns scary. You start with "Do you blame yourself?" I always get confused at that bit, even if I know what you mean, so I ask "What?" and then you continue "Well, it's quite common for a patient in this situation to feel a kind of.. guilt." After that I ask, "What situation?" And I fall. I fall into a pit, no matter where I am, and I hit the ground only when you say "The accident." And I see them. I see.. her. I see all of them, tired and hungry and weak and bleeding, trapped in their cages, and I see that stupid scene of where I messed up so badly and the pain and the hate and the envy and sorrow and anger all come rushing back all at once-! ..and I can't look away. But when I finally do, I see myself. I see myself for the monster I truly am and I see you on the floor covered in blood with limbs missing and I can't wake up or do anything and it scares the shit out of me and I just-" 

I suddenly cup his face in my hands, turning, no, forcing him to look at me, his eyes wide and scared and shaking and wet with unshed tears. "Harlequin.. why didn't you tell me..?" I ask, my voice soft and brows furrowed. "I.." he starts, "I didn't want to trouble you with something so trivial." he admits, his eyes darting away. "Harlequin, look at me." I say, not a question yet not a demand. He slowly looks back, tears slowly beginning to gather and fall from his beautiful eyes. "You aren't a burden. You will never be a burden to me, even if I am pissed at you or something in the moment. I love you, and that's all that matters to me." I stare at him a moment, my eyes filled with love and tears, my voice soft yet firm. "I.." Harlequin starts, placing his hands on mine, "I love you too, Trini." he finishes, tears now falling freely. I smile softly at him, pulling him into a gentle hug as he cries, soft sobs escaping his lips. I slowly rake my fingers through his hair, the black tips curling slightly around the slender appendages.  

The night ends in my bed, my beloved menace of a boyfriend pressed against my chest as he sleeps. I gently stroke his hair, the tips of my fingers ghosting over his horns as he holds me tighter through the night. He doesn't wake once. His breathing remains steady and even. I'm glad he trusts me enough to see this side of him.. I'm sure not even Ticket Taker of Jester know of this softer side. But.. if anyone else in the world could've had this position.. 

I'm glad it was me.

                                                   ~~~~~~~♡♡☆THE END☆♡♡~~~~~~~