Downfall

I want to reach great heights,
but now my mind is filled with fright.

The person who was once a topper,
now struggles just to study proper.

How does it feel to disappoint everythime?
Lacking behind in a part of life,
can even wake up on time.

When I try my best but still fail,
it feels like my life is being blown down by an endless gale.

I prepare and this bell chimes in my mind to remind me everytime,"You'll definitely nail it this time."
But that bell seems to have lost the trust of mine,
probably even rusted over time.

I'm never able to do it,
it's been ages since I heard "I'm proud of you,kid!".

Others nake it look so easy,
but all this struggle is making me feel dizzy.

Yes,I get that life isn't easy and you have to work hard and try,
but my dart just never hits the bullseye.

Sometimes I just wanna sit and cry,
or maybe even look up at the sky and ask "Why God why?".