BADLANDS

hold me down

she steps into the cool night air, closing the door behind her. she's on a small, dingy black balcony, hanging on one of the top floors of the hotel.

she's surprised to see she's not alone.

he was one of them, the boy in the room who was smoking with zack. he stood on the ledge, defined jaw tilted at the ground, glowing cigarette dangling out of his mouth.

she just stood there, silent, staring at the ethereal lights and ignored the vicious clawing inside of her stomach and enveloped the cold, icy air.

the tension hangs in the air, pressing down on her, but it's not an unpleasant feeling.

it's like she's skimming her feet against the water of a pool, trying to decide when to jump in.

the boy next to her shifted suddenly, taking in a deep, sultry breath. she snuck a glance.

he was wrapped in a thick, black coat, ripped jeans underneath. his dark brown hair was mussed up, vacant blue eyes clouded by the smoke in his face.

"what kind of deal did he make with you?" he suddenly asks her, keeping his eyes on the skyline.

"who?" ashley lies, hair dripping over her face as she stares at the ground.

"don't play dumb," he says, putting out his cigarette. he sighs, as if he knew she was lying to herself.

she searched his face, but he was still a stranger. "he's going to help me... i don't know. put my music out there?"

he had no reaction. ashley thinks about it for a second, biting her lip. "and.... escape. he told me he would get me out of the badlands." she adds slowly.

the sound of him crushing his fists against the balcony startles her. she can hear his heavy breathing.

"what did i do? who even are you?" she exhales.

"it's not you," he looks at her, drawing a breath out of her, "it's him. zack. i'm so sick of his games and i'm not letting another person get ruined because of it."

his face was pale, silhouetted against the bright skyline.

ashley asks again, "what's your name?"

"peter," he answers softly, calm again. he lacked all emotion now, tall and broad like the city behind him.

"you're ashley," peter comments, "i know, i read your lyrics. i make music, like you."

she felt easily around him; as if his cold darkness drew warm light inside of her.

"did you... make a deal with him too?"

the words spill out of her quickly. the space around them is filled with colors, flashing into focus. she isn't afraid of heights, even though they're high in the air.

"yes. i made it big, i guess."

she couldn't help but ask, "what happens to the people who don't?"

"i don't know," he presses his hand against his cheek, "he killed the last girl." his dark blue eyes focused in on her uneasily, trying to sink the truth of what he was saying into her.

the words, "killed the last girl," rush through her, and she grips on the railings. she doesn't bother to ask who it is- she can't handle the truth either way.

"i think you'll be okay though," peter blurts, trying to ease her ailings. his voice was thick and slow, tone heavy, like a man burdened with the weight of the world. "i'm not going to let him kill anyone."

she didn't know him, but something compelled her to stay, with the lights rushing past and the midnight sky hanging over them.

silence ensues. she tries to think about anything else than zack and his violent energy or the boy next to her.

"the lights look beautiful, at least," she says finally, trying to forget by gazing out to the city.

"really? i hate them." he laughs, surprising her. his laugh is laced with darkness. "for some reason, it reminds me of moths, drawn to light. like we're all brain dead insects, attracted to shiny things."

"and any minute now, a hand is going to swat us all dead...." she finishes for him. "god, that's morbid. I'd like to think they're just lights."

they stand in an easy silence, feeling the warmth of the body next to her, a light breeze wafting through the air. the dirty city buzzes, with a sort of foreboding atmosphere.

"you do, don't you though?" he picks up from what she said. "you think differently than any of us. we make music for fun and get high to kill time. but you...." he waits for an explanation, looking right into her, blue eyes cold but not emotionless.

she shifts, studying his face.
"i don't know. i just want to get out of this place." the weight of her words sinks in. she sighs through gritted teeth. "i know, it's dumb. but otherwise, what's the point?"

"it's not pointless," he tells her, "it's not."

X

"throw me in the deep and watch me drown."

6:38 AM

she was woken up suddenly by a harsh, ringing noise.

they had spent the night reeling through the midnight streets, drunk and dizzy underneath those lights, clutching each other's arms like stairway railings.

she was alone now, but possessed a certain strength and energy she hadn't before.

so when the devil himself calls at 6:38 AM, she tells zack, "you can't fucking hold me down."

X