Maybe i'll walk up and just say "hello", "how are you feeling?" or "how did it go?". I'm getting nervous, I don't even know why, fixing my hair and now fixing my tie. I don't mind talking i'm just not very good, maybe forget it, don't want to intrude. What if i'm awkward, what if i'm fat? Oh I should stop it, I shouldn't think that. My devil and angel are fighting inside, I should stop eating cause i'm getting wide. I can't even think straight, i'm worthless and weak, i'm just a weirdo and i'm such a freak, I always repeat all the things that I say, why can't I think straight and not be this way? Making decisions is all that it takes, later decisions will then be mistakes. I'm just a failure I can't even try, everyone sits there and wants me to die. Do I annoy you and should I just go? These questions are asked and are answered with no. These are the things filling up my young head, I don't feel like crying or want to be dead. What is the point in adjusting my tie, fixing hair or tell a white lie? As you can see all the these thoughts just combine, not thinking straight cause they're all in a line. This means i'm hyper and happy and sad, this means I love you and now I get mad, I always feel jealous and then I feel great, now you just hate me and now i'm you're mate. I'm not depressed and I often feel fine, but who's thoughts are these and which ones are mine?
Thanks for reading, hope you liked it. :)
