~+ Clean +~ •Lovertation•

~+ Chapter 12 +~

I looked up at Rep, then my eyes darted away, starting to slowly chew.

But what if—

"So, did you hear about what John did with Lucy?" The girl interrupted my thoughts once again, and I swallowed the bite, shaking my head as I avoided her gaze.

I sighed, lifting my fork back up and forcing another bite into my mouth, trying to hold back a gag as I chewed.

"Yeah, so, apparently, John and Lucy totally, like, fucked, and it's weird though, cause Lucy's only really dated girls," Rep started, swallowing her egg.

The more entranced I got into her explanation and the conversation, the more I slowly ate, mainly due to muscle memory, but soon enough, I had eaten a little over half. It didn't really sink in with me until I glanced down at the plate.

My tooth sank into my lip, and I could feel the metallic taste of a certain red liquid seep out of the puncture created by the aforementioned tooth.

I set the plate on the table in front of me, leaning onto Rep, who had just finished hers. She set hers next to mine, glancing down at me.

"Good job," she replied praised, leaning down to kiss my forehead.

I tilted my head up so that her lips connected to mine instead of my forehead, and tilted my head a bit.

This time, it wasn't gentle. It was a needy kiss, which was mainly my fault.

I think Rep could tell, because she pulled me into her lap and continued on with the activity.
I hummed, running my tongue across her bottom lip, attempting to win the battle that I knew I'd lose. I always lost, which was fine— It was Rep.

And then, we paused as a voice rang out.

"Hey, no fucking in the living room!" Speak Now whined, throwing a pillow at us.

I fell off of Rep, landing on the couch next to the tall girl as Speak Now fled from the scene, sprinting up the stairs.

I let out a deep sigh, a little smile on my face. Rep snickered, which turned into a fit of teasing giggles.

I giggled along with her, pressing one last kiss to her lips before getting up and grabbing the plates, putting them in my kitchen sink.

I glanced next to the sink, a picture frame set up lazily on the counter. The photo contained my mother, my father, Speak Now and I a year or so ago.

I had taken the day off that day so we could go to that field and get the family photos, and we had to buy shoes on the way because our cat had thrown up across the fancy shoe rack.

When that memory grazed my mind, a little smile peeked out on my face as I rinsed the plates off— but it quickly fell as I remembered that we'd probably never be like that again.

I wonder if they still love me.

I swallowed back the lump in my throat, taking a deep breath as I walked back into the living room.

Rep sat on the couch, one of her knees pulled to her chest as she stared blankly at the wall, a faraway look clouding her gaze. You would've thought she'd fallen asleep by how still she was if it wasn't for her fingers tapping restlessly against her leg and the fact that her eyelids were open.

"...Rep? Are you okay, my love?" I asked, sitting back down next to her and trailing my hand to cup her cheek.

The girl's mouth opened and closed again, letting out little strained sounds before she just gave up and offered a little nod, her fingers drumming to a stop.