Midnight Boys

2. Cursed Themes and Nazis

A month has now passed since I woke up to a folded test with an angry 34! at the top right corner. I talked to Professor Mall, asking for a retake. That wasn't the solution on her mind.

"Harris, this isn't the solution on my mind."

I stared at her with my mouth in a soft o, dumbstruck from not hearing what I usually did when we did this dance, which was, "Now why would I do that for you? Would that be fair to your classmates who studied hard?" where she would proceed to walk out following the rest of the successful A++ students.

Nah it wouldn't be fair. I knew that. And no, I never expected her to let me retake a single test every time I asked. That was insurance for when my father would ask me what great lengths I took to succeed, I could honestly tell him I "even begged to retake it and she wouldn't let me!" Looking back, he's probably seen right through it each time.

So, there I was, standing awkwardly after fidgeting with my binder to let the rest of the students fizzle out, waiting to hear what was indeed on her mind.

"What do you do in your free time?" Oh no, whatever 'free time' activity I name, she'll uno reverse it on me, asking why I wasn't studying instead of said activity.

"Uh, well-". She held her hand up. Her expression softened, most likely two steps ahead of me, knowing I'd clam up.

"What do you enjoy doing in your free time?" Oh. Well, not biology. She raised her eyebrows, making me realize I would need to talk to get this conversation going anywhere and over with.

So, I said, "Oh. Well, um..." not about to mention not biology,

"Reading."

"Hm, do you like reading biology?" she asked innocently.

I said I didn't.

And then it all came out. I was desperate to get to my next class. I told her why I chose it. That my dad said that it would be where "the monies at" and that I was thinking of dropping out. That last part came out without me ever consciously thinking it before. It just seemed like the right thing to say since I was trying to stress how hard college was. Now saying it, it made since. And how the hell have I survived school this long on these grades anyways? I thought I'd say it to see if Professor Mall could come up with the Solution, just now remembering she said she had one.

"Son, when I started college, I went for law." She chuckled, though my mindset was so on edge, I couldn't think of anymore more unfunny, waiting for this Solution.

She continued. "In my thirties I spent time in Boston as a lawyer. When I turned 40, I left my position to move to Europe to be an au pair. Italy, specifically." I had no clue what an oh pear was, but she was on a roll, and I was getting closer to my Solution. "Then went up the Mediterranean coast, ending in Spain. I stayed with four families in total, 10 children. When that run was over, I moved back to the States and went for a degree in Education, minoring in science. Taught high school for a while. I've had different careers woven in throughout the years between then and now." When she stopped talking and looked at me, I realized it was my turn to speak.

"So, you want me to be an uh pear?"

"No, Harris", I could hear the frustration of my slowness in her tone. I wish she'd just say the Solution. "Switch majors." There it was.

"Leave biology? But... I can't".

"Why?" I didn't have a good answer to that. So, I gestured my hands around the room, hoping that would explain what I didn't even know myself.

"You think it's too late? Because it's not. I just said I went through a dozen careers to get where I am. It pains me to see you try this laid out career that you don't even remotely enjoy. Not only that, but it also pains me to fail you every week." That's fair.