Shattered Light

Chapter 2

CHAPTER 2

Selena reached for her keys in her pocket. Shit, She had left them at school. After walking all the way down to the front office, dodging the crack heads and uneven boards, she made it back to her apartment with a new key. They had given it to her without ID or anything, that has to be a security issue. Selena practically dove into her bed to take a much needed nap, but after about an hour of just laying there with no sleep she realizes Dorian had wrecked her. There is no one else to blame, considering everything that had happened after he sent that text has turned into an annoyance instead of something fun and relaxing. It shouldn't have had this much of an impact on her, besides, they couldn't be anything anyway. Selena would never date anyone that she knew too well, it would make it too hard to end things, or even too easy. She felt her phone vibrate in the back pocket of her naturally ripped jeans. Selena basically leapt out of her bed when she saw it's a call from Dorian. She hesitates before tapping the accept button.

"Selena, come over right now." He said, in an excited tone.

She's not sure what he could have been calling about on some random Tuesday, but she was overthinking what he could have to say anyway.

"Just tell me on the phone, or come to my place. It's too comfy in my bed to get up." She replied

"No, your house is dodgy, and I want you to come celebrate so come over." He sounded too happy for Selena to pass up this exciting news, so she put on her Friday outfit and looked at herself in the mirror. How could Dorian have fallen for her? She's not that pretty, and she has no money. Her personality didn't score many points either, and she has never had too many friends. She examines her face in the mirror. Her eyes are tired and her skin is dry. How could anyone look at her and think "That girl is pretty"? Everyone who looks at her must think she has horrible hygiene and no self motivation. Every perfect teen girl walking by must be repulsed. Would they care more if they knew? Would they tap her on the shoulder and tell her they liked her outfit if they knew where she lived or what she could afford? Selena liked to assume yes, but she knows that's not the case.

It feels different getting ready to go to Dorian's even though it shouldn't. Usually Selena would just put on some sweats and walk over, but today for some reason, she feels the need to put on some makeup, or even do her hair. This feeling repulses Selena. It had never been like this with one of her other boyfriends. Selena sighs and decides on a messy bun.

Before walking out the door, Selena looks at the one picture on the empty, white wall. It's a family photo from when she was two years old, she was on her dads shoulders. She noticed the worried look on her moms face, while her dad had his arm around her waist. Selena knew why her dad left, but little about her parents' actual relationship. Selena's mother and father got in a huge fight one night, although she only heard the start before aunt Katrina came to pick her up for a sleepover with Dorian. She was only five years old at the time so she doesn't remember it well, all she remembers was her dad slapping her mother across her face and prior to that, talking about responsibility and other topics Selena didn't pick up on at age five. When Selena came home that day, her dad had left and her mother was passed out on the couch. Selena tears her eyes from the photo and forces herself out the door.

Selena liked going to Dorian's house. It was the prettiest colour of blue and the lawn and garden were perfectly cared for. The inside looked as if it was a showhome, everything perfectly clean and organised with incredible decor. She also liked how Dorian's room was the only room that didn't fit with the house's colour scheme and general cleanliness. Selena never understood why her mother refused to take money from them, they clearly had enough. Selena's mother was always scared to ask for or receive help from anyone, it's almost as if she needed to be even with people. Like if she accepted money or any form of help, she would have to repay them. Selena sometimes thought her father put that trait upon her.

Selena jumps off her much too small bike and puts it in Dorian's garage. She doesn't knock on the door, as usual. When Selena goes in the house, she hangs up her coat and looks around the very open first floor. There isn't anyone in the living room so she calls out for Dorian. "Dorian? Where are you?!" She listens for his response "One Sec! I'll be right down! Just go sit down!" Dorian calls back. Selena makes her way to the extremely beautiful living room. The rugs are welcoming but not too extravagant, the sofa is neutral but not in the boring sense. You would think Katrina was an interior decorator if you were to look at her home.

Just as Selena pulls out her phone Dorian comes running down the stairs. "You're always on your phone Selena, put it away, I have big news!" He says with a big smile on his face. She rolled her eyes, she in fact, was not always on her phone. Besides, she didn't have to worry about the news. If he was happy, she was too. He sat down across the room on a big light blue chair.

"So, Selena, how are you? I heard Taylor has another new guy. That has got to be annoying!" Dorian says with a ridiculous looking smile. If he only called her here to ask her how she's doing, she might just kill him right then and there. She couldn't have biked all that way just for a quick chat with him. "Cut the shit, Dorian. You can't have asked me here just to ask how I am!" She replied, bitterly. He laughed at her, knowing exactly what he was doing. Selena knew him long enough to recognize most of his expressions. She knew his "I know something you don't face" and his "I need to tell you something face" and everything in between. "Okay. When I tell you, Promise you'll be happy for me." He keeps smiling while he talks but now he looks a little worried, and it worries me. "Yeah okay, go ahead." I say, Hesitantly. Dorian takes a deep breath and pulls a letter out of the back pocket of his blue jeans. Selena recognized the seal on the letter almost immediately, Princeton. The letter is opened already, and based on Dorian's facial expressions, he got in. He hands selena the letter, and studies her face, as if he was waiting for her to either jump up and hug him or just sit in disappointment. Selena should be leaping out of her seat into his arms, but she's too selfish. Princeton is in New Jersey, they lived in Colorado. Twenty eight hours is not a car ride Selena intended to take. Dorians smile begins to fade

"Selena? Say something please." She didn't want to say anything really, she knew she was so proud of him for getting in, but leaving him for that long would be tough. "Does your mom know?" She asks "Not yet, but what do you think Selena?" He looks worried. Well what does she think? Well obviously she doesn't want him to go, they haven't been apart for more than a week at a time! She should have expected this, with his grades and how much he wanted to go, he was bound to get in. Maybe Selena could do a twenty eight hour drive. Twenty eight hours once a month couldn't hurt, right? "Go! Dorian this is incredible. How could you pass it up? I can do the drive once a month, plus it's a year and a half away, you have time here." Selena only partly meant what she said. She knew it would hurt to see him leave, and she wouldn't have anyone to vent to or hang out with. Well she did have Taylor, but hanging out with her was exhausting. Selena couldn't tell Dorian that she didn't want him to leave because she knew if she said that he would end up going. Of course Selena would do the same if Dorian told her not to go somewhere. Selena proceeded to put on her biggest smile "This will be great Dorian. Please go!" What would this mean for them? Would Dorian go off and find some pretty, tan beach blonde with a perfect smile and hair. That would be Selenas worst nightmare, not because she would be jealous, but just because that kind of girl was horrible for Dorian. "Wow... I- Ok." he said hesitantly. "Yeah, ok I'll go. Unless you change your mind and want me to stay, then I will Selena just tell me." He looks her in the eyes as if looking for any sign of sadness or regret, but she couldn't show that she didn't want him too or he wouldn't, and his future relied on it. "Dorian, you need to. As much as il miss you, this is a once in a lifetime opportunity that you can't turn down, so please go." She put on a smile and gave him a hug. Would it be selfish if she wished he didn't get in? The love confession was enough to screw up their relationship, but moving across the county? What would happen? It wasn't in her hands now.