The line between white and black, that's where I found myself often.
The greyzone.
A comfort zone to a lazy girl.
Lazy girl, that' s me, Maddy.
My best friend seems to firmly believe that if I quit being lazy I'd probably achieve something, or find someone too for that matter.
But what can I say, I am lazy to the bones.
What's the use of being energetic and active.
What has that ever achieved.
Been there done that, what did it get me.
I'll tell you, it got me more work, more pressure, more expectations.
People looked up to me, but it never did feel honest, like I could feel the facade that they wore from a mile.
They say eyes never lie, the eyes that I saw looking at me, with a smile on their face, their eyes spoke a different story, there was no respect for what I achieved, no genuine happiness for me.
The more I met people, the more masks I could see, made me sad just a bit more.
The fake smile that they wore when they see me, made me sad
And as days passed it just grew. The sadness became an endless hole, a blackhole that sucked my energy bit by bit.
And now I am shell of a person that I once was.
I laugh at all the right times, I smile when situation demands it.
I go out and work towards things that I am supposed to be doing.
I eat, sleep, pray, work and repeat.
