If you told me a year ago me and Chris broke up I would've never believed you, for obvious reasons. We were the happiest we could ever be, it felt like all we needed was eachother. Though that couldn't have been more wrong.
I sat in my living room scrolling through instagram, which neither me or Chris unfollowed each other on. I saw he had posted something new, but when I saw what the post was truly about my heart sank "so lucky to have you, i love you" the caption read as there was 2 photos of him and his new girl together, and what he had done for her.
Everything he had done for her he had done for me first. It might sound stupid but I miss him, I miss when he would come over and just lay with me, when he would give me a kiss and tell me how beautiful I was, and now what, he was doing it with her?
I couldn't help but feel hurt as I watched the boy I had so desperately fallen in love with, fall in love with another girl.
I decided to go see Nick, him and I stayed in touch and remained friends when me and Chris broke up, me and Matt stayed friends too but I was just closer with Nick.
I knocked on the front door praying Nick would be the one to answer but when the boy I once new every thing about opening the door my heart immediately felt heavy.
Why did I feel so sad? We had left off on good terms and every other time we hung out or saw eachother I never felt like this "hey y/n" he smiled, there was no bad energy between us and we still remained decently friends and I was ok with that, Until now.
"Hi Chris" I said as I forced a smile "Nick?" He asked, I nodded and walked past him to Nick's room, "hey" Nick said as I laid on his bed.
I stayed silent for s moment "I miss him Nick, I never thought I would miss him the way that I do right now because usually I would be fine seeing him stand in front of me or I'd be fine hanging out with him but Nick when he opened that front door for me less than five minutes ago, my heart felt more heavy than the day that we actually broke up" Nick looked up trying to take in the information he was just blasted with "y/n you guys are on good terms, why do you feel that way?" He asked " because I saw the Instagram post about his new girl and for some reason I feel jealous and hurt if he's cheating on me, but it's not even the case wishes that we could've tried again but I see that it's not gonna happen" I looked down at my hands " you know you think that he's in love with her, but in reality all he ever does is talk about you talk about the way that your eyes squint when you smile in the way you can't laughter when somebody brings up middle school humor. He talks about the way that you dress the way that you do your hair the way you do but the way he talks about her nowhere talk about all the things that he did for you when you guys were together and then he says he's gonna go do it with her her, honesty compares her to you. It's the closest thing that he can get to you without actually admitting his feelings" This information was new to me and honestly I was shocked, was Chris really comparing me to her?
"Nick, I love you" I smiled and hugged him before leaving his room, as much as I wanted to stay, I knew I had to talk to Chris.
I found him in the living room " can we talk?" he noted his head, and I took his wrist and took him to his room, where we both sat down on his bed to talk. "Do you love her, truly?" I asked "what?" He asked back furrowing his brow's "your nee girlfriend, do you love her?" I asked once again, he sighed "y/n I will never ever love anyone as much as I loved you and I need you to know that I think that there is some type of feelings towards her, but can I be honest with you?" I nodded reassuring him to continue " I still love you more than anything and I kind of feel like there's this whole in my life that just can't seem to be placed without you like I need you in my life in order for it to be complete and you know I'm scared of relationships I was scared of you for the longest time. I was just scared to be with you. I didn't know you and I didn't know how you were." I was confused " so then why are you with her? You don't know how she is. You don't know her. You guys have only been together for a month or two, and you didn't even know her that long before getting with her" he nodded " I know, but I wasn't sure if you really loved me the way that I loved you so in order for me to feel like I was still with you I treated her like I treated you and pretended that she was you" as the words left his mouth I couldn't help but be shocked "y/n if you told me that you love me right now and you asked me to break up with her. I would in a heartbeat because there's not anything in this world that I wouldn't do for you." I smiled a little " there is but I know what you mean" I looked at him, his pupils growing bigger the more I looked at him " I love you, Chris more than anything" his eyes lit up " give me 10 minutes" he said leaving the room, I heard him on the phone with the girl, but I chose to ignore it "I ended things with her. She took it well only because she knew that I was in love with you." He smiled knowing he didn't have to crush her heart to end things with her, he hugged me as soon as he put his phone away "can we just try one more time" I asked "always" he said kissing my forehead.
