Chapter XI

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The next day, Tam woke up just before lunch.
In Italy her foster parents had only allowed her to sleep that long on special occasions so she usually woke up at nine. But since the last day had been really exhausting she slept way longer.
Additionally, Rachel and her had sat on the balcony for about two hours before they finally decided to go to bed. Although she felt a bit confused about it, but she really liked Rachel. She seemed to be a kind person and Tam appreciated her honesty.
As she stepped into the kitchen she saw only Alfie standing at the fridge, searching for something inside it.
"Oh, good morning Dornröschen," he said. And since Tam spoke fluent German she knew that he was referring to the fairy tale of sleeping beauty.
"Morning" she mumbled and sat down at the table. "Where is Rachel? And Aidan?"
"Packing their things. You'll stay for lunch and then leave for the airport."
She nodded, "What do we have for lunch?"
"We still have some bacalhau a brás, or you could have some caldeirada de peixe," he explained and as she didn't answer he added, "You still got time before lunch is ready. If you wanna do something else, feel free to do so."
She rose from the seat and left the room. She wanted to go for a little walk through the sunflowers, because she hoped to feel less scared when standing in the nature.
For over ten minutes she was just wandering around. She had to admit that she wasn't really less scared but the nature had a positive effect on her anyway. She walked through the fields, before she suddenly heard a voice.
"Hey, kid!"
It was Alfie who was standing in some distance.
She turned to him, "Yeah?"
"Get over here, I wanna talk to you."
Immediately she walked to him and with a slight movement of his head he told her to follow him. Together they continued walking through the sunflowers.
"Yesterday I told Aidan that I had already planned for you to be part of the mission," he suddenly said, "but honestly, Tam, at first I didn't want that, too. For the same reasons like Aidan said. You survived hell, no doubt, but this is something totally different."
"But-"
"Nah, shhht. I'm talking. Because obviously you are part of the mission now."
She nodded softly and he smiled, "It's a totally different thing and I need you to remember this. See, I organized for you to become a professional spy. Not because I want you to die in that business, but because I want you to live. You didn't choose to be part of it, you were born into it so you have no choice but to become a spy. Now, you can pity yourself or you can just accept it because you won't get out of it anyway."
"Oh, don't be so motivating..." she mumbled.
"It's the truth, kid. You better face it at your own will or it will make you face it. And none of us wants that," he stated, "Yet, you had the training. You got some valuable experiences due to the load of shit you went through.
I wouldn't send just anybody on that mission. If I thought you were any less responsible, I would so definitely keep you here where I can look out for you on my own. But I think of you as a smart kid. If anyone can go on a mission like that, it's you," he stopped for a second, "Awful. There won't be any more complements! For that you can wait for the rest of my days."
She chuckled, "Yeah, I already wondered when did you become so kind?"
"Silence, Tamara, silence is your friend. Be quiet," he ordered but the smile on his face told that he was not nearly as angry as he sounded.
"Anyway, it's your acid test. If you survive this shit - and you better survive it because I'll kill you again if you don't -, then you're ready to slip into the business at once."
"With- without a proper training?" she stammered.
"Of course you won't do it all on your own. You're good but you're no superhuman," he chucked, "You'll get a mentor to teach you all the things you couldn't do so far," he turned around, "But that's a problem for future-you. No need to stress yourself now."
"Ha ha, funny, Alfie. If you wanted me to be chill, you put me in the wrong place."
He turned around and they slowly walked back to the house again.
"Calm, kid. You're harder to kill when you're chill about shit. It's a law of nature. The most chill agent lives the longest."
"Wasn't it 'the bigger the lie the better the spy'?"
"You read Elly's book?"
"Who didn't? I just didn't know that my brother was her boyfriend. Or that I'd be working with her one day."
"Well, you can count on her. Rachel went to a lot of shit as well- you all did. No need to talk about Aidan..."
"What?"
He smiled softly. "He had a life before you were born, you know?"
"Obviously."
"He survived a lot of things."
"What kind of things?"
"That you gotta ask him himself. I ain't telling stuff about my agent's past."
"But he's my brother!"
"And he's my agent."
"Unfair..." she grumbled.
"Let's call it... responsible. Unfair is, that you won't see my sunflowers bloom if you die, so you better stay alive."

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