Corruption of Ambition | Sejanus Plinth

Sixteen

Riyana arrived late to class for the first time in her academic career the next day. She had spent nearly an hour using Beatrice's makeup to conceal the purpling bruises across her neck. She was a mess by the time she got to Heaven's Bee Hall, having dealt with Beatrice's yelling and rushing the process since she wanted to use her makeup.

Riyana had considered opening the door and letting her sister see the reason her appearance had occupied so much of her time that morning, but she could not see what good it would do. If Beatrice were to be let in on any of the story, she would insist on knowing every detail, and even Riyana's perspective on everything was broken fragments. So, Riyana stood in front of the mirror, with bloodshot eyes and raw skin, applying, washing away, reapplying, until she knew her time was up and she had to accept that it would not be perfect. All signs of altercations were hidden away, but she would not have an explanation as to why her neck was much paler than the rest of her skin.

She had been hoping to ask Beatrice how to mix the products to get a tanner shade, since her sister was much paler than herself, but when she went to knock on her door, Beatrice had already left.

Riyana paused at the entrance to Heaven's Bee Hall and considered turning around. She was already late, and it wouldn't make a difference if she just called in and said she had food poisoning, expressing her deepest regrets for being so unprofessional to call in with such short notice. If she had known how unnecessary her presence would be, she would have turned around, but instead, she decided to go in.

Sejanus was the only one to look up at Riyana when the door opened. The tribute-mentor duos were engaged in full discussion, with the exception of those whose partners had been taken by the bombings. Livia Cardew sat at her table with arms crossed, glaring at Satyria. Reaper, the District Eleven boy, sat alone with a dried blood-stained bandage wrapped around his head. Palmyra Monty, the mentor for the now-dead District One girl, had not bothered to show up at all. Sejanus sat alone at his table and did not take his eyes off Riyana for the entirety of her walk to the table next to him.

Riyana stared at the empty spot opposite her, the seat where only a week ago Sabyn sat laughing. The room felt too quiet, though she knew it was only in her mind, chatter emanated throughout the open room. She felt nauseous as a wave of guilt flooded into her stomach, remembering she had still not sent the letters to Sabyn's family. It was not for lack of trying, she was sure she had used an entire journal with drafts, but everytime she would crumble the paper and start again. Her skin began to heat and prickle uncomfortably as she thought about it all, and she worried the makeup would melt off.

"Hey, you alright?" Sejanus asked, leaning over towards her desk.

Riyana stiffened at his voice. "Fine." She replied shortly.

She refused to spare him a glance. She could tell, even through the mask in his voice, he would have a sorrowful expression. She did not trust in her abilities to see him look hopeless and make no effort to comfort and assure him. With her fathers threat fresh in her mind, her eyes remained glued on the empty spot opposite her.

"I don't get why we're here." Sejanus said. He seemed completely unaware of her reservations.

"Mhmm." She hummed, pretending to flatten down her uniform skirt.

"Are you sure you're okay?" Sejanus asked, finally becoming aware of her change in behavior.

"Fine." She said, almost instantly regretting how irritated she sounded.

Sejanus reached out, presumably to grab her hand, but she scooted in the opposite direction and brought her hand up to her desk. Sejanus blinked and leaned away, sitting up straight in his chair.

"Are we okay?" He asked.

"We have no quarrels, if that is what you mean." Riyana said, hoping her uneven voice did not betray the uninterested persona she was putting up.

"Why are you acting like this?" Sejanus asked quietly.

Riyana took in a deep breath and did not exhale before replying, "I don't owe you conversations, Plinth."

"I don't und-" Sejanus was cut off by Satyria's presence.

Both students looked up at her expectantly as she handed them each a stack of paperwork. 

"There is no point in keeping you two here, run these to Dr Gaul's office and you can head out for the day." Satyria told them, already turning on her heel.

"I can just take them myself." Riyana interjected.

Satyria turned back around, an expression of irritation growing on her face. "That's not what I said."

Hoping she could simply convince Sejanus to part ways on the walk, she nodded and kept her mouth shut. She stood first, and Sejanus fell into step with her as she exited the hall.

"Ana?" Sejanus asked.

"Riyana."

She wished she had not looked at his face as she corrected him. The way he blinked several times, as though his vision had affected his hearing. The way his eyebrows, just moments before furrowed in concentration, lifted with surprise. She knew she would only have to hurt him more as the conversation continued.

"Did I," He paused, his walking coming to a halt at this point. "Did I do something?"

His emotional pain would be better than physical harm, she knew this, and repeated in her head as she responded. "You have made Aiden see me as a desirable partner again. There is no reason for this friendship to continue." 

Riyana's breathing came to a halt, as she waited for his response. She felt her bones tense up and her core clutch as she prepared for the screaming, but Sejanus was so quiet when he responded.

"Is that what last night was?"

She had to look him in the eyes. Words meant nothing if he could not see how serious she was. She might not mean the words, but the implication, that end result, the fact that whatever she and Sejanus had, must come to an end was true.

Forcing herself not to look away she replied, "Yes, he was dancing with Beatrice. I only wanted to make him jealous."

Sejanus' eyes began darting between her own, as if one of her pupils would reveal a different story, one he wanted to hear. She wished he would look angry, that he would lash out, she understood all of those emotions. She did not know what to do about the confusion and betrayal his expressions were portraying.

"Are you serious?"

Riyana felt her muscles resist her actions as she nodded. "Yes, no hard feelings." 

"That's all I am?"

"Yes." Riyana replied, looking away.

Sejanus did not respond for a moment, and Riyana assumed the conversation was over. She would not look at him to gauge his reaction. Then, so quietly he replied.

"Oh."

Something about his voice, something about the way he didn't seem shocked- It was as though he had expected this all along- she turned to face him. Her facade shambled at his expression, she wanted to see anger. She could navigate it, she could not navigate his defeated expression safely.

"Sejanus I..." She trailed off, not sure what she could say.

Sejanus shook his head. "No, honestly don't even worry about it. I was the one stupid enough to believe I'd actually found someone different from here. You only did what I should've known you would."

He took the papers out of Riyana's hand. When he continued walking, she did not follow him.