Toxaemia

10 0 0
                                    

Everyone says my head's with the birds
Cause I'm dazed on your narcotic words
Believing all your husks of promises
Keeping all my expressions for hostages
You've got me drowning in mercury rivers
Decaying me, stripped down to slivers
Reach through my veil of arrogance
Tear through my skin and innocence

A fool giving up on belligerence
Use me to disguise your impotence
I'll let you take off my chains, dear
Glittering diamonds on a chandelier
Cracked paint, dust on a broken screen
Submerge me in your flesh until you're clean
Now Eden's overgrown in briars and gloxinia
And my arms run black with your toxaemia

In hindsight, you were my opioid
Course into me, angelic asteroid
What I craved more than rose water
Until it let me down to inner self slaughter
From the inside out, evolving bite
Resolved not to be your acolyte
Resolved not to be your verifier
Torn apart on your razor wire

Return me to better, not bitter
I stopped being your little transmitter
I'm not alone, I've got the right people
Cause your emotional maturity is just foetal
I figured out how to break your chokehold
And now you gaslight, calling me ice-cold
I've ceased seeing you in rosy sepia
Yet my veins still crawl with your toxaemia

Glass gems, false silver turning skin green
Untruths spiral and I'm breathing benzene
Torso on fire until my ribs are ashed
Until my wrists fall from the post with my back lashed
Binary coded blackouts, waking from dreamscapes
Realised that in the mirror, your touch left scrapes
Crimson trails and intravenous addictions
Stop speaking, vomiting your fictions

Bodies on the ceiling, high on lies
Compounded element and I'll alchemise
Come bathe in black-lit fluorescence
Feel the lightning of my quintessence
Luminous celestial twisting violently
Falling deep, past measured bathymetry
In the end, you're my immaculate anathema
I don't miss your kiss of toxaemia

---------------

This was written to express getting away from a toxic situation and how it can linger and affect you even after it's over. Please, don't let them win.

Skulls and Chrysanthemums - an Original Poetry CollectionWhere stories live. Discover now