"walls of insincerity, shifting eyes and vacancy."
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y/n's pov:
i'm on my fifty-third attempted rewrite of a chorus when i get a call from my manager, cecilia.
"hello? what's up, cece?"
"haven't gotten very far through that chorus, huh?"
she can probably hear the annoyance in my voice.
"yeah... i don't know what it is, but i can't seem to find anything to write about. i think i've run out of exes."
she laughs and i can almost picture her chewing on her pen on the other side of the line.
"maybe you just need to write about something new. maybe something besides heartbreak... something like..."
"-love?" i guess. not really what i wanted to hear, but pretty much what i expected.
"yes! love! it's the season of love, you know.."
by that she means it's february. my least favorite time of the year. it's valentines day in three days and since i can never seem to make my relationships last until february fourteenth, this is just another year on the growing tally of years without a valentine. i like to release breakup albums on valentines day. it feels like i'm getting some kind of celestial revenge on the universe. it's very satisfying.
"cece, it would be a lot easier to write love songs if i was actually in love with someone."
"find someone to be in love with, y/n. it can't be that hard, you're basically the leonardo dicaprio of your generation."
"that doesn't make it easier."
she huffs through the phone, definitely getting tired of me.
"sorry, i'm just feeling very writer's block-ey right now," i say.
"yeah, i know, hun. been there, done that. you're a bit too young for tinder though, so you gotta put yourself out there some other way."
"i'll consider it."
"ok, well, i need to go check on the strudel i was trying to bake, but consider away, little bird."
she hangs up. she's called me little bird ever since we first met, when a bird flew into my window and promptly died. i tried to do cpr on the dead bird and then cried when it didn't work. i open instagram on my phone, determined to either find a distraction or find inspiration. momona and xochitl are arguing about something in the group chat. messages pop up every three seconds and i'm considering leaving. or muting it. just then a facetime notification from momona, xochitl, and mckenna appears on my screen. i accept the call.
