stuck in the middle with you.

ابدأ من البداية
                                        

"I think it's for the best if we just stop this." He said quickly like ripping off a bandaid.

Y/n felt a lump form in her throat and it hurt to swallow.

She blinked. A beat passed and she felt like she couldn't speak.

"Stop?" Was all she could say, it sounded weak and croaky.

"I-" He was almost speechless. He saw the glaze of tears spreading over her eyes and a wave of guilt spread underneath his skin like wildfire. But he did not back down and backtrack, he just waited for her response.

He felt guilty, but he knew if they'd gotten even more serious, and he'd told her he loved her and finally told her how he felt that this cloud of trouble that came with being famous would follow her too.

She just nodded at him, biting her lip trying to hold back the tears. They'd risked it, and now they were suffering the consequences. How could they even be friends after something like this? It hadn't been smart at all! She felt like a fucking idiot. This was her own fault. She should've known. Even though Harry is sensitive, even though he is kind, even though he acts like he is hers, she should have known that he did not want to settle down with her. Be with her. He'd had their whole lives to try it on with her, what made her think adding some sex was going to change that?! She felt ridiculous, this was so fucking cliche. She had become that girl. That stupid girl who believed she could change him.

Now she just wished she'd done nothing at all and stayed inexperienced and sad and alone. At least then she didn't feel this painful weight in her chest like she couldn't breathe. Like an elephant was sitting on her chest and she had a rock in her throat. She wanted to claw at the skin by her jugular rip it open and dig out the uncomfortable lump.

It hurt terribly to lose him that first time when they'd only been friends. How would she recover from this? It took her months to move on from that. She was a deeply sensitive person, who despite contrary beliefs noticed little things about people and picked up on things others didn't. She wondered if it was because she had no experience with romantic love and only just these deep-rooted friendships. But it meant losing a friend felt like mourning. She didn't know if her heart would handle this. She felt embarrassed that she cared so deeply.

But he wasn't just a boy he was Harry. He was one of her oldest friends. He knew her, he really knew her, better than anyone else. And now she just had to forget him?

Suddenly those nights that were perfect had begun to tarnish with a bitter blackness that she couldn't stop. She couldn't talk, she felt like she'd been winded.

Harry said nothing and watched her, waiting.

She stared at the hands in her lap and her eyes looked like they were a second away from spilling a tear. When his hand reached for hers, she acted like his touch had burned and only then did she look at him. He felt guilt crawl under his skin and he felt like vomiting as a sweat crept up his neck.

"Okay. I understand, it was never meant to be more than once anyway. You can go now, I don't feel good. I don't want you to catch this cold." She said with a flat soft tone, fast like she had something better to do, and like this was very unimportant compared to her other to-do's.

When he looked for the hurt in her eyes he was met with a harsh cold look he hadn't expected or ever seen in her eyes.

"Okay, I'll see you."

His hands itched to stroke her cheek but he refrained and instead got up put his coat on and left without another word. When the door shut and she heard his footsteps get quieter Y/n placed her hand on her heart and begged for her lungs to breathe, as a wetness landed on her cheeks and she fell to the floor trying to ground herself. Where had all the air gone? He hadn't taken that with him too, had he?

NO STRINGS ATTACHEDحيث تعيش القصص. اكتشف الآن