You are my Sunshine

Chapter Six

Had I forgotten to lock the door last night? I had been out pretty late, Josh took me out to dinner with the band members and their girlfriends. It had been a great night, we went dancing after and everyone had a little too much to drink. Except for Josh of course. He drove me back to the hotel, but I don't think he walked me to my room. Maybe I didn't lock the door. But there was someone in my room and I was completely defenseless. Crap crap crap!

"Ellie"? I heard Josh call from the door. An immediate feeling of relief washed over me, knowing it was only Josh and not a murderer or a rapist.

I tried to call out to him but it came out as a growl, my throat raw and scratchy from throwing up all morning.

I heard him walking towards the bedroom, moments later I felt the pressure of his weight sitting down on the bed. I was rolled over on my side, facing a bucket I had put on the floor. I wanted him to come over and look me in the eye, I wanted him to comfort me. But I couldn't get my mouth to work.

"I have known you since grade 9, and not once have you ever left your door unlocked", he said jokingly, but I could hear the worry in his voice.

As if he had read my mind, Josh got up and came to my side of the bed, kneeling down so he was eye level with me laying on my side.

"Do you want me to call your doctor"? he asked, a look of concern flashing over his face.

I managed a nod, I also managed to motion for him to get me water. He found my cellphone quickly and turned it on. It only took him a moment to scroll through my contacts and find my doctors number.

"Hi yes, I'm calling on behalf of Elizabeth Miller"? he said to the receptionist.

"Um, yes she's experiencing a terrible-" he trailed off, I realized he didn't even know what was wrong with me.

I motioned towards my head and he nodded. "Yes, she's experiencing a terrible headache. No, I'm not sure how long it's been going on for. Yes she has been throwing up. I don't know. Why does that matter? No I am not. Will you just tell me what the fuck is going on? Hello? Hello"?

He threw my phone down on a chair in the corner of the bedroom. Something was wrong. He swore at the receptionist. I knew he had a terrible habit of swearing but I had never heard him swear at a stranger, or a professional.

I coughed, clearing my throat. "You shouldn't swear at people, Josh", I said, my voice extremely raspy.

"Why didn't you tell me"? he asked, his voice shaking.

"Tell you what"? I didn't need to ask, I already knew the answer.

"You know exactly what I'm talking about, Elizabeth. Why didn't you tell me? Why did you wait for me to hear from some rude old receptionist in a doctors office"?

I tried to answer, but I couldn't. Tears instantly came crashing down, pouring down my face. It wasn't helping my headache, but it wasn't like I was doing it on purpose. Josh was beside me in seconds, his hurt expression instantly gone as he became my soothing, comforting Josh that I knew for 13 years. He hadn't changed at in those four years.

"I was too scared" i whispered.

An hour later, after Josh had gotten me Advil for my headache, I explained everything to him. And the entire time he sat in silence, listening to every word I said. I told him about the emails, the headaches, I spilled my guts out to him, and didn't hold anything back. When I was finished, we both had tears in our eyes, and he pulled me into his arms.

I let myself stay there, so comforted by the familiar smell of him. I felt balanced by Josh just holding me, like the fact that I was in his arms could make everything go away.