Our Blue Spring- Satoru Gojo x Reader

Leaving

You were almost stunned at his words. You had never seen him this vulnerable. You kept your gaze on him and swallowed a lump in your throat, unable to respond due to the heat rising in your cheeks and your palms beginning to sweat. But his next words left you in an even greater state of shock.

"Be my girlfriend, please." He says, quietly for only the two of you to hear even though there was nobody else in the room. He couldn't get his voice above a whisper, he was too nervous to hear what you'd say. You could hear the desperation leaking from his voice as his eyes stared right into yours, not looking away once, afraid that you'd disappear if he did. He brought his hands from your waist to cup the sides of your face, his thumbs grazing the plump flesh. A beat passes, then two and Satoru begins to get more anxious, nipping at his bottom lip with his teeth. Was this a bad idea? Has he been getting the wrong impression the entire time?

But the nod of your head when your words failed you as your eyes stared back at his was all he needed as confirmation to gently bring his lips to yours. Closing his eyes and relishing in the feeling as he pulled you in even closer. You stood on the tip of your toes, kissing back which caused him to smile into the kiss before your hands found their way into his hair, deepening the kiss. He lets out a small groan before you pull away for air, panting. Your lips were swollen and glossed in his spit, chest heaving up and down from the intense kiss, standing underneath the dim light of your cramped dorm room, but he still thinks you look as beautiful as ever. You always do.

The rest of the night was spent with you curled up at Satoru's side in your bed. It was small, but anything would do. You were both too happy to care. At this point, you were fast asleep, but Satoru hadn't shut his eyes for even a second. He admired you the whole night, brushing the hair from your face and pulling the blanket over your body whenever you tossed it around in your sleep. Though, his body heat was enough to keep you warm. You were both each other's lifeline. He finally had the honor to call you his and all his nerves from the last couple months died down the moment you reciprocated his feelings. You were his world and he swore that he would never let you go.

But he couldn't do that. He broke the only promise he had made to himself as he was standing in front of you at the train station 5 years after that night. Tears were threatening to spill from his eyes as he spoke with shaky breaths. There really wasn't anything he could do to make you stay. Your mind was made up. Your train would arrive in 10 minutes. He only has 10 minutes left with you. He doesn't even know why you're leaving, you refused to tell him, afraid that your beliefs wouldn't clash with his, so you decided to pack your bags and pursue a new life because you're a coward.

"Please, at least tell me why you're leaving." He spoke, attempting to reach out for your hand in which you pulled away.

You took a step back and sucked up the tears in your eyes, though the grip you had on your suitcase was enough to show that this was equally as hard for you.

"I can't, Satoru. I just need to go. This isn't for me, I can't keep living like this." You tried to make your words sound as stern as possible, but failed. The tremble in your honey like voice not going unnoticed by the man in front of you. The man you once loved, still love, but you have to leave him for your own sake. You know that if you told him your true motives, he would insist on going with you, but you couldn't let him do that. He has a life here unlike you. People need him for the world to remain in place, but he needed you to keep his own from crumbling.

"Was it something I did? Please, tell me. We can talk this out. You don't have to leave." Each word that left his mouth became filled with more and more dread and sorrow that this wasn't all just a sick nightmare. This was actually happening and he was about to lose his light, his love, his motivation to keep going. He couldn't let you slip between his fingers.

He stepped closer, but you backed away.

Your lack of response was enough to make a few stray tears fall from his eyes. He didn't bother to wipe them away. That didn't matter to him right now. All he was focused on was getting you to stay. And oh how he'd give up anything just for that.

You couldn't bear to see him cry. It pulled at your heartstrings, making you want to wipe his tears with the pads of your thumbs and tell him this is all just a joke, you aren't leaving. But lying to him would only add salt on the wound. You resorted to looking away, keeping a tighter grip on your luggage to the point your knuckles turn white.

Trains blaring could be heard from a couple feet away. This was your cue to go. Leave everything behind and start a new life even if it meant leaving him as well. He could feel his heart drop even more, the hope beginning to fade away as he grasped the harsh reality of the situation.

"At least kiss me, at least tell me you love me, please." He was on the verge of begging for just one last thing before you go. Something to remind him of you when you're gone.

You hesitated, sucking in a breath as the train stopped behind you, doors opening as people begin to gather inside. You raise your head to look at him, placing a soft kiss to his lips. You could feel his tears falling and soaking your cheeks. He kept a firm hold around your waist, only moving his face a couple centimeters away to study you, keeping this image engraved in his mind as it may be the last time he ever sees you. Your hair flowing down your shoulders, your e/c eyes once filled with happiness now replaced with ache, your soft, pink lips, your nose which he loved to kiss, your cheeks that would hurt from how much you smiled whenever you were around him. He'll remember it all. The day he forgets this, you, every moment you've spent together is the day he dies. And even so, he'll carry you in his heart in every lifetime.

"Is there anything I can do to get you to stay?" He pleaded, with one hand on your hip and the other on the back of your neck, gently massaging the skin.

"You know the answer to that, Toru."

Knowing he may never hear you call him that sweet name again causes him to wince inside. It felt like a punch in the gut. Despite it, he shakes his head and pulls you in closer, breathing in your scent one last time.

You pull away from him and take his hands in yours, placing something in his palm. It was a heart shaped locket, a photo of the both of you inside with the tiny words "I'll always love you" engraved in the back.

The train makes one last call, and you turn away, stepping inside. He attempts to hold onto you, spin you around and pull you into his arms. He'd reassure you for a thousand hours if you asked. But he couldn't.

He looks at you and promises, "I'll find you again. No matter how long it takes."

You give a small smile, doubting that possibility and mumble a "I'm sorry, Satoru."

The train doors close, taking you away. He watches it in the distance, his heart heavy and his eyes stinging. He turns around, holding his head in his hands as he begins to cry and sob, clutching the locket in his hand, not caring who might see or hear him. You slipped between his grasp and the fact forever haunts him.