I stare at my reflection in the mirror. I run a brush through my hair. Watching as my hair fall into straight waves. I pick up red lipstick. I smooth it on my lips, puckering my lips when needed. I smile at my reflection. I grab my mascara next and brush it on my curled lashes. I add black eyeliner around my green eyes. Making my eyes pop. I move onto eyeshadow and blush.
As soon as I'm done my makeup I look for flaws in my face. It seems I can never get a satisfaction in my looks. I always pick at flaws I didn't even knew existed. I notice the little ugly things nobody would notice even if they were standing super close to me. I look one more last time before walking out my bedroom.
As soon as I walk down stairs everybody stops and looks at me. I smile knowing their staring at this thing they all call beauty. But I know that makeup is just a mask. My parents smile proudly at how everybody admires their new reformed daughter. But what they don't know is that underneath all this make up, is that pretty hurts.
In the real world looks matter. And no matter how hard I try I'll never be perfect. I always try to fix something that can't be fixed. I can't understand. When I was just the ugly duckling nobody wanted to talk to me but now that I've transformed, everybody cares. Sometimes I wonder what would have happened if I just stayed my ugly self instead of becoming a goddess.
I continue to walk down the spiral staircase and all the guys continue to stare. With my silk white dress pooling just above my knees, I feel fake. Because I know this isn't really me. I feel the urge to go up and grab my leather jacket. This definitely does not feel like me. Why am I trying to pretend to be good? Oh right for my parents. I promised them I would try. As soon as I'm down the stairs, Collin grabs my waist and looks at me like I'm a prize. All the other guys get the message that I'm his.
"You look gorgeous tonight" Collin says kissing my cheek.
"Thanks Collin " I say holding his hand.
"You always look amazing though. I'm proud to call you my girlfriend. Isn't it extraordinary that our parents can't wait for us to get married? Personally all the other lads are gonna be jealous of my beautiful wife." Collin smirks at me and brushes his brown curls out of his face.
"Well as much as I'm flattered Collin, but you haven't discussed getting married with me and what if I don't want to?" I say frowning at his assumption.
"Don't want to? Are you trying to break up with me? And I was just making a little joke out of it Clarissa. I kind of assumed that you would want to marry me. I mean come on I have a lot of money, I have good looks and I can provide for our family. And I love you" Collin says looking me in the eyes.
"Collin, I don't think you really love me. You're in love with my looks,body and part of my parents wealth. And we are in 12th grade not college. You're also in love with the fact that I capture just about everybody's attention. You are thinking about what everybody would say if they saw me on your arm and how I look on your arm" I say starting to get frustrated.
"How can you say that clarissa? We've been together since freshman year. But if you wanna take a small break from us than we can take a break. Because I don't think this is working out to well. If you are going to be like this, we shouldn't be together until you are sure about me" Collin says getting louder with each word.
"That's it? You aren't even putting up much of a fight for someone who claims to love me! And I know you have been running around with Brittany behind my back the whole time. So we are done Collin, it's not a break, we are simply over." I say walking away.
I go up to my bedroom and rip my dress off. I find my ripped black skinny jeans and find my red crop top. I go to my mirror and put my waist length hair up into a pony tail. I rake my fingers through my hair giving it a wavy,sexy, messy look. I grab my leather jacket and find my military boots. I stomp down the stairs. This time not looking at anybody as I make my way to the front door. As soon as I'm out the door I slam the door and look for my motorcycle in my huge garage.
I know it's cliche, the bad girl has a motorcycle. I hop on as I see a guy bolt out the front door.
"Clarissa! Wait stop- Collin starts but the rev of my engine cuts him off and I'm roaring down the road.
