Back porch, gossip, and a bathrobe

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"Missy."

     She was laying on her stomach, reading one of the magazines from my bag. Her head whipped up when I called her name. I had told her about them on the way here, so that I wasn't mad about. She had dumped half of my stuff on the ground, which did irritate me a bit. I went and sat on the bed by her head, avoiding eye contact.

"Before I ask this, don't make any assumptions- matter of fact, don't say anything that isn't the solid answer. Uh.. how does Sheldon feel about me?"

     She didn't move a muscle or say anything for the first few seconds of processing my question. However, a small smirk grew slowly until it spread across her cheeks, signaling she instantly knew every unspoken detail and intention behind my question. She let out a breath and shut the magazine rather dramatically, sitting up, still smirking. She just stared at me, and I could feel my cheeks getting hotter and hotter by the second. 

"What???"

"First things first, did you even hear our conversation earlier?"

     The parts of it I did hear came flooding back to me, and I sighed. I looked down at my hands, as I began to pick at my cuticles, which was a bad habit I had developed a while ago. 

"Yeah. All I needed to hear."

"You seem sad about it."

"Well, how could I not be? Knowing what I know now."

"Are you sure you heard it right?"

"Yes, positive!!"

"Okay, okay! ..well, if you did, I don't think you would be very sad right now."

"What? How could I not be sad?"

"..nevermind. I don't think I have the right to tell you, even though I really, really want to."

"Why not??"

     She simply sighed and shook her head, a clearly disappointed look on her face. She laid back down on her stomach and returned to the magazine, ignoring my attempts to continue to pry the truth out of her.
     Eventually, I decided it was no use. I let out a frustrated groan and stomped out of the room, and even though I knew it was childish of me, I just couldn't help myself. I was so angry and confused with all these emotions running through my head. I headed through the house, now controlling the volume of my footsteps best I could as to not wake anyone else up. I threw open the back door, taking in the dark and empty backyard. I shut the door behind me, sighing heavily.
     I sat down on the back porch stairs after turning on the light. I stared out into the backyard, taking in every little insignificant detail. It all seemed so still and peaceful. Sometimes, I wish I could feel as peaceful as nature seems to feel.

"What on earth are you doing out here?"

     I whipped my head around at the sound of his voice. He stood in his cute pinstriped pajamas that were the same as I had remembered them, looking very confused and shocked to see me, as if he had simply been on his way out here. I didn't think about how he had ended up here, however, the whole reason I had come out here reminding me to not let my guard down. I simply turned back around towards the yard, not answering the question. 
     I could practically hear the gears turning in his head, even without looking. He was most definitely choosing between going back inside and going back to sleep or staying and attempting to comfort me, which I was positive wasn't his strong suit. After at least a minute, I heard his light footsteps come up next to me as he sat on the stairs beside me. 
     I didn't speak, and as soon as I saw him sit out of my peripheral, I turned my head slightly away so he couldn't see my face and I couldn't see his. The silence was deafening, only broken by the occasional sniffle or adjusting of his robe from Sheldon. I was not about to be the first to speak.

"May I ask, what are you sulking about?"

     I knew he didn't mean that in a rude way, so I let it slide. If it were anyone else, I might have punched them for saying that. 

"Nothing. Why did you even come out here anyway?"

"Well- I- sigh I heard footsteps, and I already couldn't sleep, and so I went into the hallway to investigate. I saw you hurry out the back door, and so I couldn't help but feel curious. It is also very cold, and I was a little worried you were leaving."

"Why would you be worried I'm leaving?"

"I- I don't know. I suppose I didn't want you to be abducted."

"This is the safest and most tight-knit neighborhood I know. Besides, I live, like, two houses down!"

"Please lower your voice. If my mom finds out I'm still up.."

"Why do you even care if I leave? I thought you wanted me to."

"What could have possibly given you that impression??"

"Just- nevermind, Sheldon. Nevermind."

"Well, you've sparked my curiosity. Now I must know."

"I heard you! I heard you telling Missy. You were mad she invited me over without consulting you first."

     That seemed to hit a nerve. He went silent instantly, his usual stillness now being a bit eerie. I couldn't help but steal a glance over at him. He was still staring at me, but his cheeks were very red. His eyes were a bit wider than usual, his mouth slightly parted.

"What..??"

"That's.. not.."

     He trailed off, staring at me but not really seeing me. He seemed to be finding what words to put together to form the right sentence. Before he could, however, he stood up abruptly, breathing heavily. He looked at me one last time before powerwalking as fast as he could back into the house, clutching his robe. 
     That was not the reaction I had been expecting. If he did want me to leave, I assumed he would own up to it. That's what Sheldon does, he's honest. And he also started to say something. He said "that's not", which could mean so many different things. That's not important? That's not okay? That's not right? I don't know. This was going to bother me for a long time.

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