Selfish Love

Chapter 48

He pulled me up by my collar and made me face him
"You and Judy" he snapped and my eyes grew wide in realization

"How did you...."? He cut me off with a punch to my nose

"Son of a bitch" he growled as his fists kept hitting my face, I could feel my eyes gets swollen and the metallic taste in my mouth

I hit his hands with both of mine and he let go, making me stumble back.
"Sam...." He cut me off

"Shut up Jordan, I never expected this from you, I didn't think you could do something like this to Andre" he spat before his legs came flying to my face, I grabbed it and flung him to the side of the bed.

He hit hard and fell to the ground with a loud thud, he groaned and tried to get up.

"At least let me explain myself" I almost yelled, he scoffed and spit out blood

"There's nothing to explain Jordan, you know how much he loves her and yet you would do this to him" he yelled before lunging towards me with full force, I was faster than him and he knew that, so I grabbed his hands and held it behind his back, while I held his neck in a tight choking grip

He struggled to get out but I didn't let go, not until I could feel his strength leaving him

I pushed him away and he stumbled and almost hit his face on the bedframe before he balanced himself, he was panting and so was i.

I let out a long and huge breath
"I didn't mean for it to get this far" I breathe out before plopping down close to him.

My room was already a mess from the fighting.
He was sitting with his knees up and so was I, with our back on the bed frame.

My face was bruised badly and there was still taste of blood on my tongue.
I wonder how Sam got to find out about Judy and I, if he knows then Andre already knows.

We were both breathing our panting coming to a stop, Sam didn't look any better than I did, only his face wasn't bruised up like mine

"Judy and I...." I sighed out pausing for a while ".... didn't start out like this, I didn't intend for it to go this far, trust me Sam I never meant to hurt anyone" I explained looking ahead.
"I hated Judy, infact for a long time I disliked and hated her guts, and then one night, one night all that changed, a change I didn't expect" I paused remembering how it all started
"One night we had sex and that was the beginning of this rollercoaster, and before you asked it started way before she started dating Andre" I muttered "I tried Sam" I said lowly swallowing the lump in throat "I tried so hard to stop but I couldn't, even after I realized Andre was in love with her, I wanted to stop but I couldn't" I whispered feeling my voice break, I quickly cleared my throat.
"You can hate me all you want Sam but I'm sorry, and I know Andre probably hates me right now, hell I would hate me" I muttered chuckling at the end.

"Do you love her"? He asked his voice coming out hard but soft than when he just came, I froze at the question.

Do I love Judy?
Am I attracted to her? Yes.
Does she make me do crazy things? Yes
Do I wanna love her? Definitely no
Do I love her???

"I don't know man, I mean I can't even answer that, I'm not the one for her, I don't deserve her, I can't give her the happy life she deserves, there's only one person who can do that, and it's Andre, not me" I whispered looking in between my legs

Sam suddenly got up and dusted off his body, he looked a lot more composed than when he just came.

"You should put some ice on that" he muttered pointing to my face and I just sighed and nodded
"Sorry about the mess" he muttered gesturing to the state of the room and I just shrugged.