New Years Day / Roy Kent

22. Daily Planet

"Can you just tell me I fucked up and then go?"

"Not gonna do that, bud." Ted corrected.

"I lost us the game. I'm a piece of shit."

"Easy now. You had a bad day. Big whoop." Ted corrected.

"Big whoop"?" Roy questioned.

"Yeah, big whoop." Ted agreed. You beating yourself up is like Woody Allen playing the clarinet. I don't wanna hear it. All right? So just, you know, knock it off. Go easy on yourself. Okay? Hey. I got your back. Ain't nothing gonna change that." Ted assured Roy softened just slightly. "Look at you in there, looking like a brunette Oscar the Grouch." Roys phone buzzed and ted moved to it. "Oh it's Emilia, thats a nice picture of her." he added. "You want me to answer it-"

"No." Roy barked. 

"Hello?"

"Um..." Emilia pulled the phone back double checking who she called. 

"This is Ted Lasso." 

"Put the phone down." Roy barked. 

"Hi Ted... is... I swear I called Roy." 

"You did he is in a garbage can at the moment what can i do for you?" Ted questioned. 

"PUT THE PHONE DOWN!" Roy demanded. 

"Is this the new smartphone Roy?" ted questioned. "It's nice, my screen broke, i need one of those screen protectors for the next one. Has a nice hand feel to it-"

"Ted, Ted, Ted." Emilia begged. 

"Yeah?" 

"Tell Roy to call me later." Emilia instructed. 

"Okey-dokey." Ted agreed. "Bu-bye now." 

"Bye." Emilia agreed hanging up. 

"She's nice." Ted put roys phone down and he settled back down. "She wants you to call her later. So things are going good between you two?" 

"Yes. Now get out." 

"You want to talk about it?" Ted questioned leaning on the garbage can. 

"I want you to get the fuck out." Roy corrected disappearing into the ice water.

+

"You know, David, we got one final game this season against Man City, and our goal is to go out like Willie Nelson, on a high." Ted assured. The reporters chuckled. "Oh, how about Trent Crimm?" Ted requested. "And if memory serves, you're from the Daily Planet, yeah?" 

"Trent Crimm, The Independent." He corrected standing up.

"Ah, yes. That's the one. Okay What's your question, Trent?" Ted questioned.

"Many of your young players have improved during your tenure." Trent began. "Then there's Roy Kent. He played dismally last match. Thoughts?"

Emilia stared back at the screen, Roy was an older player he wasnt old but football standards most moved to coaching and he knew from a deep dive she wasnt proud of that Roy had some knee problems. 

"Way to go for the jugular Trent." Emilia murmured into her phone. 

"Well, I think you could ask Roy himself. He'd tell you it wasn't his best day." Ted agreed. "But I'll let you know right now that Roy Kent is the backbone of this team.'' Ted assured. "All right, let's mix it up in here a little. If you're an introvert, I want y'all to raise your hand. You guys get the next few questions." Hands flew up and Ted laughed out. "Ah! That was a trick! If y'all were really introverts, you would've been quiet as a church mouse. Unless that church was Westboro Baptist. Those turkeys won't shut up."

"Hey." 

"Hey." Emilia answered. 

"You gonna talk?" Roy questioned. 

"You want to go on that date before or after you are relegated?" Emilia pondered. 

"Fuck off." Roy countered but he couldnt stop his smile as he spoke into the phone.

"Yeah, yeah." Emilia agreed. "Liam is playing video games with Kit for the foreseeable future because they are both children-"

"I'm a free babysitter." Kit corrected. "Can you order us a pizza before you leave?" 

"And more root beers please mama!" Liam added they both couldnt tear their eyes from the screen. 

"You free right now?" Roy agreed. 

"Yes. I'm just going to order the boys a pizza and refill their drinks." Emilia agreed. 

"I'm coming over... text me your address." 

"I feel like y'all are about to do some improv comedy or tell me that you're dating each other. Either one's cool with me. 'Cause your suggestion is ally." Ted assured.

"We have to take Roy out of the starting lineup." Beard corrected.

"I see. Okay." Ted said slowly.

"It wasn't just one bad game, Coach." Nate added. "He's showing his age, and he's made significant mistakes in each of the last five matches."

"We just haven't been bitten in the ass by them yet." Ted assured.

"But yesterday our butts had teeth marks." Beard corrected. "Deep ones. The kind you usually have to pay for."

"Guys... I'm not benching Roy. He's our captain." Ted corrected. "But I want you to know that I value each of your opinions. Even when they're wrong." Ted added. "I was really hoping it was going to be improv."