cigarettes after sex

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You were standing outside waiting for your ride, you could smell the rain in the night air and hear the loud music from inside the house, you just stepped out of.

A car you knew too well came to a stop a few feet away from you.

Picking up your bag from the ground, you walked towards the passenger side and opened the door with a wide smile.

"What happened?" your best friend, behind the steering wheel tilts his head to the side as he asks. You dismiss him with a hand gesture, signaling him to just start the car and drive.

Your phone screen lights up the car. It's awfully silent, the only thing you can hear is the engine and the cars driving past you and you try to distract yourself from the awkward silence.

It's not the first time Jisung picks you up after a situation like this but it gets more awkward after happening many times.

You can feel Jisung's occasional glance towards you, you know damn well you have to tell him why he had to pick you up again, but you hoped you could delay it for a bit longer.

Jisung finally comes to a halt in an empty parking lot, he unbuckles himself and turns his body slightly your way "So?".

You don't look up, trying to ignore his piercing gaze.

He coughs to get your attention, you look up "It's so dumb." you chuckle and search for the pack of cigarettes in your pocket, "You know just the usual." Putting the paper between your lips and cupping the flame of the lighter to burn the tip of your cigarette.

You inhale the smoke into your lungs, the taste of tobacco filling your mouth.

Cigarettes stopped giving you the effects you so desperately need ages ago. At this point, it's just an addiction, but you're still trying to chase that feeling of ecstasy and relief you got when you started to smoke.

Jisung's face showed open disgust. He didn't mind you smoking in his car but he also didn't approve of it. He hates that you smoke, he didn't want you destroying your body but he also knew he had no right to tell you off.

His fingers moved to the little latch on the door, to open the window slightly to at least let some fresh air in.

He so desperately wants to just take the deadly stick from your lips and throw it out the window. He wants to tell you that you should stop and search for other coping mechanisms and that he's there to help you through all of it. But instead, he just sits next to you every time and observes how you exhale the smoke from your gorgeous lips.

"Listen, you wanted me to pick you up, and you're obviously hurt" Jisung was looking at the mascara streaks running down your face, exposing you were crying, "so just tell me what he did this time."

You exhale another cloud of the toxic smoke before speaking "It's just, we were making out, about to-" You pause and look away in embarrassment, "You know... anyway, he basically broke up with me and walked away again"

The brunette looks in the opposite direction, trying to hide the annoyed roll of his eyes. He takes your hand in his and locks eyes with you "You need to let him go for good. He's not worth your time. He broke up with you over seven times in the past three months"

You know Jisung was right, he always is. But you're only human, with needs. And your boyfriend -now ex-boyfriend- makes you feel wanted, at least most of the time.

"You deserve someone who treats you better, who knows your worth, who treats you like a princess" Your best friend's eyes are filled with so much concern and love for you. You've seen him look at you this way so many times. You know he has feelings for you. You know you shouldn't play with him and give him hope, yet here you are crawling over the center console onto his lap.

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