LGBT+ Interpretation

LGBT+

"Time is up! Pass your papers to the front!"

Those who had been asleep sat up again and tossed their answer to the person in front of them. Others disregarded the clock and continued to work.

I snuck a glance at Peter's paper. He'd written on both sides of the half sheet, and was still trying to write, making his handwriting smaller and smaller as he squeezed in his last sentences. The only reason I know is because I do it on every written response. I looked down at my own paper. I'd only written one sentence.

What does LGBT+ mean to you?

LGBT+ is an acronym of four letters and a symbol that stand for anything other than a guy who likes girls being attracted to a girl who likes guys.

Clearly not the answer Mr. Larson was looking for. I passed it forward anyway.

=*=*=*=*=

I was on my back, staring at the ceiling when Peter finally came back to the room. He was probably in the only outside area of the boarding school we were allowed to go. He left our door open, and sat down on his bed, red solo cup in hand and a fog in his eyes. I could hear the music from the hallway he'd involuntarily been bobbing his head to.

I was so confused. How could this fool in front of me have so much to write about the meaning of LGBT? I'd been bothered all day by this question, and now might be the only time to get it answered.

"Peter, what did you write for the question on the board today?"

"I dunno man. Something I guess." He got up and shut our door before throwing a bag of popcorn into the microwave. Peter turned to face me with a serious expression on his face. "What does it matter to you, are you gay or something? It's not for a grade. It's just a warm up. Just chill out man."

"I can't figure out why he would ask that in a creative writing class. It has nothing to do with-"

"I'm tired. 'Night."

He "Zzz"-ed off to sleep leaving me with a bag of popcorn to finish by myself.

=*=*=*=*=

My life has been a routine since the day I was born. I figured, after watching a few times, that I'd be fed 10-15 minutes after I woke up. If I always woke up at 7:06, I would be able to get to school at 8:10 everyday. And I did. The present is no different. I wake up at 8:16 everyday, get breakfast, shower, and arrive at the classroom just an hour and 14 minutes later.

Mr. Larson must've noticed too because he was in his room before anyone else entered.

He didn't greet me, he just made a motion with his finger telling me to meet him at his desk. So I walked over and sat down, facing him.

"Although I don't take the responses at the beginning of the day for a grade, I still find a great joy in reading them in my spare time. And yesterday after class, I found a rather peculiar answer to yesterday's question," he said, and flipped through the half sheets of paper piled on the left side of his desk. Next to the stack I noticed a picture of Mr. Larson and his husband smiling without a care in the world. Ohhh.

"Here it is," said Mr. Larson, "Neil, does LGBT really only mean a few letters to you?"

So this is what all the strange looks throughout the day were about. I exhaled slowly before answering.

"I figure everything is just a title. Straight, gay, bisexual, whatever. They're all just subcategories under 'Attraction'. Then I read this book and it spoke what I've been meaning to say this whole time: what if there's not just a complete homo or hetero, and there's only a thing called sexuality? And it's unpredictable and has infinite possibilities and it changes like all our advances in science? Our sexuality could be as different as our fingerprints or each snowflake.

"I know the community is all about equality, but what's the point if you're going to create boundaries in the first place? Hetero and homo are basically saying normal and not normal. And everything that isn't normal was less than the apparent majority. But I guess some didn't even fit into those two categories, so we created subcategories under the ones that were already being treated unfairly. If we had a word that lets things be unpredictable and bendable, encompasses all and had a non-exclusive policy, there would be no need for boundaries let alone the need to feel equal.

"I know 'queer' covers anything that's not straight, but it also means 'strange'. And we're not. This is the normal. There's no reason to feel different. So yes. They are just letters and a symbol, only because we could already let sexuality be itself." I was out of breath and now sweating. It felt like I took a load off my chest and laid it all out.

Mr. Larson nodded slowly in approval and slight understanding and I continued to focus on my breathing. Then the pounding on the door started.

Whoops. The door was propped open when I came in, but I shut it afterwards. I stood up and started to make my way to the door, walking backwards slowly until I could fully view the contents of Mr. Larson's desk, seeing the couple once more. When I opened the door, I was greeted by Peter who said, "Finally. I've been waiting for ages now."

The class poured in as we took our seats. Mr. Larson stood up to begin the day.

"Instead of a response question today, I feel the need to discuss some of your answers from yesterday..." he nodded at me slightly.

I was slightly surprised when I found myself nodding back, sharing the same knowing smile.