𝐂𝐨𝐮𝐫𝐭𝐥𝐞𝐧𝐬 𝐋𝐢𝐟𝐞- 𝐈𝐦𝐚𝐠𝐢𝐧𝐞𝐬

𝟎𝟕- 𝐒𝐮𝐠𝐚𝐫𝐡𝐢𝐥𝐥𝐃𝐝𝐨𝐭

I thought it was gon be a one time thing but let's just say that at first we were just fuck buddies until... he started texting me how my day been and all that then one thing led to another— now we're here. We both lay on the bed and get under the big bed spread that he has and I love so much. I prop myself up on my right elbow looking down into his eyes since he's laying down. His hand starts rubbing my bare thigh knowing that I love when he does that— it keeps me calm and collected. "I was just thinking about like.. what would it be like if you weren't Kevin's opp or what if I didn't hit you up?"

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' I wanna show you off .

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He started laughing a little at my question? I'm being serious right now and he wanna laugh. "What's funny? I just wanna know.." he makes eye contact with me again after he stops laughing. He pats my thigh a few times then begins rubbing it again. "Nothing's funny baby it's just that we've had this conversation a few times already and I'm starting to think you just like to hear what I got to say." Now that I really think about it we have... and he's right. I do like to hear what he has to say, it's like reliving the moments all over again or feeling like we just started fucking with each other.. again.

I let out a slight laugh showing him that he is in fact right. "Ok... maybe I do a little bit. You gon tell me every time right?" He nods his head. He don't have a choice but to tell me— I'm just kidding.. I feel like he got a soft spot for me on the low, I asked him one time and he got mad that I asked. maybe even a little embarrassed cause his cheeks kind of turned pink along with his ears turning red. When he tried to respond his voice came off harsh and low like he was shy to admit it. I found it cute that when I started teasing him about it he ignored me for three hours straight. Once I seen him again that day I went off on him about ignoring me and I apologized for it. He even apologized and said he wouldn't do it again— surprisingly he's kept his word.

Ever since he hasn't done it again— although I don't give him a reason to. "I got a question though.." he nods his head for me to go on with my question. "Ok so what are we? Like are we in the talking stage, am I just someone who keeps you distracted or what?" I think about this exact category everyday. I just never had the time to ask it— ok that's a lie. I always had time to ask it, it was just him that was always busy. I was busy as well to but not as busy as him. There would be days where he couldn't text me back because of him being busy and I understood that cause he's more than just a rapper. He would of course make time for me when he could and I really appreciated that.

. * . * . * .

' I wanna show you off .

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I watch as he takes a deep breath in and let it out. "No your not a distraction. Yes we're in the talking stage, I just wanna give you more time to think if you really wanna hop into a another relationship.." he said his voice serious and genuine with his words. I'm sure I wanna be with him yet he is right about giving me more time. Am I fully healed from Kevin cheating on me? Do I trust that he not gon do the same thing although he has shown me so far? I mean I didn't immediately text Darrian after I found out about Kevin and that female. It took me like almost a good month to text Darrian. Ever since then he's been helping me heal.

I know why he's saying this though because a few times when Darrian asked to link up I cried in front of him. In his car. About Kevin and how my feelings for him weren't fully gone at the time— that's what I get for fucking with someone who is a few years older than me thinking just because he's older that he's mature and wouldn't cheat. Those few times he would let me cry— telling me comforting things in my ear. After that he would take me to go get something to eat and we'd sit in his car talking about ourselves to get to know each other better since we were just fuck buddies at the time.