Lavender & Ice

40. A New Dwelling

Ashima chuckled. "It's funny how comforting the fire is now, when only minutes ago I was miserably hot and thirsty. I know caves and caverns are just like that, though. No matter the outside temperature, they hold true to a nice cool constant. But it's still always a wonder to experience."

Joreth stood and stared at her again before speaking. "Kietnan had said you can't regulate your temperature as we do. Is this acceptable?" He motioned slightly to the fire as his face remained expressionless.

"Yes, thank you Joreth." Her heart softened as she realized he had only lit the fire for her comfort. "So... what now?"

"I cannot be gone for long. I must return. There is more wood in there." He pointed to a large shed with an open front, with wood stacked taller than her, stacked many levels deep. That should last a good while. He continued pointing and walking through the room as he spoke. "There are sealed provisions in these crates here, this is a pump for freshwater, behind this door are chambers to relieve yourself..." Ashima followed behind as he spoke, listening carefully.

"Thank you, this is perfect." She offered him a small smile but then frowned as he simply stared at her again. "And how long do you think I'll be here?" Alone. She thought.

At this, his expressionless facade faltered and he frowned slightly. "I do not know." He stroked his chin in thought and eventually his facial expressions changed as if he was trying to decide whether or not to say more.

Eventually he sighed and looked at her again as he continued. "We have a beacon going out to the Aerulians." She gasped in surprise but kept quiet and let him continue. "Apparently my ancestors kept this one gift from the Aerulians in case of an emergency. It has never before been used." He sat on an old wooden bench beside a table and she mirrored his actions. "We are not sure how far their technology has advanced in all that time, we can't be sure they will even receive it."

"I can help!" She stood up in excitement. "I know a bit of their technology, and I know our technology, if I can take a look at it I can see..."

He held up a hand, cutting her off. "You'd never get near it without being found. Do you wish to return?" He looked up at her as he leaned his back and elbows against the table while crossing his ankles.

She opened her mouth to respond but no words came out. Her heart hammered in her chest as she sat down and exhaled loudly, feeling defeated. "What do you think I should do Joreth?" She looked at him and noticed the slight surprise in his eyes. "I don't want any harm to come to your people either. I want them to continue to thrive and grow and be happy. If me leaving is truly the best thing for everyone, then that's what I need to do. But I..."

She swallowed, her throat suddenly feeling thick and dry, her next words coming out in a whisper. "The longer I remain the harder it will be for me to leave. I already feel so... " she drew in a breath. "Conflicted."

"Conflicted? About what, exactly?"

She glanced at him but quickly looked down at her hands. "My first days here I was so scared. All I wanted was to flee this planet and return to my ship, to my crew, my friends. Even though I knew that wasn't possible. Then all I wanted was to return home to my planet, to my family." She drew in a breath.

"Family?"

"Just the one, actually. My grandfather is all I have left now. I can't imagine how worried he must be. I wonder if he still holds hope that I am alive or if he has already grieved for my death." At this, she did finally let tears run down her cheek. But she quickly sucked them in and wiped her face.

"Your wish is different now?" Joreth asked, offering her a cloth he seemed to pull from thin air.

She glanced at him again, not comforted by his expressionless face. She sighed and wiped her nose with the cloth. "I find myself thinking of home less and less." She said softly.

A long silence passed between them before he spoke again. "And instead?"

She knew what he was asking. He was observant as well, she was sure. She looked him in the eyes, unsure of what to say, if she should say anything at all. Instead she noticed the similarities in his features to Kietnan's, as she stared at him.

Her emotions could no longer be held at bay as his face came to mind and memories flooded her. Pain squeezed in her chest as she thought of letting him go, to never see him again. Thinking of him moving on and finding a beautiful, more suitable, Qarthan woman to become his wife and give him children. Tears streamed down her face as a sob escaped her and she moved her face into her hands as she drew in deep breaths, trying to control herself but failing miserably.

Joreth opened his mouth to speak but then stiffened and stood abruptly. "Stay here"

Ashima barely had time to process his words before he disappeared up the tunnel.

Moments later she released a breath when he returned with Teluq, the female guard she had at the Grand Hall. They were each carrying a large bag.

"I would have been here sooner if I didn't have to carry both of those by myself."

"Teluq will stay here with you." Joreth ignored the guard as he spoke to Ashima.

"You mean I don't have to stay here alone?" Ashima couldn't hide her excitement.

"Of course not." Teluq said and winked at Ashima.

Relief filled her as she let out a deep breath. "Thank you." She said to both of them.

"I must go." Joreth nodded at them. "Do not let her leave the cave, Teluq."

Joreth looked at Ashima for a long moment before he nodded and left the cave without another word.

"Come on, Ashima, help me unpack this bedding."