TW!!!!: ED
i walk into the living room where my bf Colby and all of our friends are. I'm wearing colbys hoodie so he can't see my stomach. When I was younger I had a really bad eating disorder but since I've gotten to LA it's been better...until now
I walk over to Colby and snuggle up with him. "Hi." "Hi pretty" he responds before wrapping his arm around me and kissing my forehead. I shouldnt have a care in the world rn but all I can do is pray he doesn't feel how thin I've gotten. I'm quieter then normal and he notices. "You ok babe?" He asks. I just nod. "I'm just...tired" "y/n I know that's not all your acting different ...u haven't had energy in days and I know ur sleeping because I sleep right next to you every night." "idk.." I respond. "Y/n talk to me babe..what's going on". "Nothing" "y/n-" "nothing!" I say. "I'm going upstairs" I go into my room before he can say anything.
I pull out my strawberry vape and inhale it. Colby doesn't like when I vape but in this moment I need to. I hear a knock at the door "y/n?" I see the door open and I quickly shove the vape in my pocket and try to blow the smoke away but it's no use bc he smells it. "C'mon hand it over" "hand what over?" "Don't play dumb with me y/n I saw you shove the vape in your pocket now give it to me." "No way it's mine!" "Y/n what has gotten into you?! First your obviously hiding something from me and now you vaping again?! Just give it!". As he goes to reach into my pocket I shift and in the process of that my sweatshirt goes up for a few seconds. Just enough time for him to notice. I watch as his face falls as if he's seeing things that aren't there. "Baby lift ur sweatshirt." "Why?" "Please ... just do it" "no" I reply as he calmly walks over and puts his hands on ethier side of my sweatshirt and gently pulls it up. My stomach is flat and way too thin. Thinner than anyone stomach should be. His face drops as he sees what's in front of him.
"Oh baby...baby...baby what are you doing to yourself?" I don't reply. I just start crying. He pulls me into him and holds on to me so tight it's like I'll disappear if he lets go. "I'm sorry...I'm sorry..I'm sorry" I just keep repeating. "Shhh...it's ok....we're gonna fix this...I should have noticed sooner..why did u go back to this you were doing so well." "I had to ...I just wanted to feel beautiful" he keeps one arm around me and uses the other to lift up my chin "you are beautiful..please don't ever forget that" he says as he kisses my forehead. "We're gonna get you better ok baby? I love you so so much" "I love you too" I respond.
I knew how hard the road to recovery was gonna be...I'd been there before and now I'm back at square 1...but if he says I'm gonna be ok... I think I'm gonna be ok.
A/n: sorry that ending was trash anyways SUPRISE LOOK WHO'S BACK FROM BEING MIA!!! I litterly have so many half written storys that I'm gonna share with u guys soon I promise
Also if ur struggling like this please reach out and get help. Your beautiful and your so very loved 🫶
