on temporizing || Dream SMP Timeloop Fic

Chapter 32

"L," Dream called after him.

~~~

"--right? It's a genius plan!"

"Okay, but have we considered the consequences of destroying the moon?"

Tubbo shuffled in and plopped him down on the couch next to Tommy. "I have no idea why you're in my house or what's going on, but count me in."

Dream and Tommy exchanged glances. Tommy raised an eyebrow. Dream shrugged. Tommy turned back to Tubbo. "Sure, Tubs. How do you feel about nuking the moon?"

157. (credit to Smallest)

Contrary to popular belief, Quackity could not talk to ducks.

Which was honestly a shame because they would make excellent informants, but hybrid status didn't really work that way and thus Quackity could not talk to ducks. Just like how Philza Minecraft (allegedly) could not talk to his crows, though for some reason a flock of them followed him around and he could sometimes be seen talking at them. Probably some magic bullshit that came with Philza's rumored immortality or whatever.

Point was, Quackity could not talk to ducks. But at the moment, he really, really, really wished he could. Mostly to ask what the fuck these two were thinking.

"Why," he demanded, slamming his bedroom door open. "Why are you like this."

The two ducks that had moved into his living room (without Quackity's permission, but the man hadn't been able to chase them out yet) blinked up at him, nonplussed. One of them quacked. The other one shuffled a little, then waddled one step forward. They both resumed their rendition of Canon in D.

"It is literally the witching hour," Quackity informed them. "I need to sleep. I have a date tomorrow."

The ducks continued to 'sing'. Quackity took a threatening step forward, but the moment he came within three feet of them they took off. He was forced to duck (ha) to avoid concussion à la flying poultry. With a frustrated scream, he slammed the door shut and fell back into bed, stuffing the pillow over his head in the hopes that it would drown out the quacking.

Spoiler alert: it didn't.

~~~

"You look like shit," were the first words out of Sapnap's mouth. Quackity sent him a disgruntled look.

"Thanks, Sapnap," he drawled. "Just what I wanted to hear."

"It's the truth, man." Sapnap stepped closer, reaching up a hand as though to feel his forehead before catching himself and lowering it. "Are you okay?"

"Rough night," Quackity answered. "The Pests kept me up."

"Pests?"

In answer, Quackity jabbed a thumb behind him. Sapnap followed it to the two ducks currently perched a ways behind them, who were watching them with beady eyes. A wide grin pulled at his lips.

"Aww, is Quackity becoming a mama duck? Are those your little ducklings?"

"Fuck no. They're little shits that moved into my living room, and I am fucking sick and tired of them squawking 'Never Gonna Give You Up' at the top of their tiny lungs in front of my bedroom door at two in the fucking morning!" He directed the last part at the ducks, neither of which appeared concerned by his ire. Pest #1 even began preening. Quackity threw his hands in the air. "See what I mean?! Little shits!"

Sapnap cackled. "Sounds like normal imprinting behavior to me."

"What, did you burst into song at ungodly hours of the morning when Bad adopted you?"