DharmaPriyaa: Heart of Truth

12. Her Outburst

Yudhishthira's mansion, Indraprastha

Devika burst into tears, clasping a sleeping Prativindhya in her arms.

How would she live without her kid!

Her tears kept drenching the baby. She pressed him tightly on her bosom. With each sigh from her already shuttered heart, Devika felt the need of executing her decision.

This needs to be done, however painful it might seem!

For the sake of all her loved ones!

"Maharani!"

A maid's voice made Devika turn.

"It's time for Kumara's evening meal." She softly reminded.

Devika nodded, letting out the breath within. One final time she kissed the baby's head before handing him over to the maid for taking him to Draupadi's mansion. Her moist eyes followed the path till the kid was visible. Her tears flowed again, blocking her sight. She stood rooted where she was, untill a guard announced Yudhishthira.

Devika wiped her face and sank on the coach, trying to calm herself a bit. Yet her inner turmoil did not go unnoticed as she sensed Yudhishthira's concerned gaze upon her.

"Are you alright?"

Devika swallowed the lump inside her throat. "I have something to tell you, Maharaj."

Her broken voice and pale face did not feel right to Yudhishthira. "Later." He softly said. "You need a good sleep."

Devika shook her head firmly. "It's not a casual matter that can be delayed for an entire night, my King."

Her formal address made it clear to him that she would not be at peace untill the matter, whatever it was, had been put forth. He subtly nodded.

"Maharaj Ajatashatru, you never ignore anyone's plea." Devika continued. "I hope you would fulfill my wish too." Her voice felt too cold, and her face looked sterner. Yudhishthira held his breath in some unknown fear.

"Maharaj, it's my prayer to you, abandon me from your life!" Her lips parted to utter those words without showing a single line of her unshed tears on her face.

"Do abandon me, Lord of Indraprastha. Remove my existence from your family, your kingdom, your entire world. Let everyone forget that you ever had a wife named Devika Gauvasani. For," she pursed her lips to send her tears back. "I am not the woman you deserve."

Yudhishthira gathered himself before holding her arm.

"From which world of mine shall I abandon you, Maharani?" It took all of his strength to keep patience in his tone. "From which life shall I remove you, you being my very life, my very world?"

Devika shook her head, this time looking more determined. "Don't, my King. You will have to suffer forever because of me. I can't let that happen. I have to leave!"

"And you will let me fall powerless forever without my Shakti?"

"I am not your Shakti, Maharaj!" A lone teardrop escaped Devika's eyes after long, ignoring all her struggle not to cry in front of him.

"I could not become your Shakti! In all my efforts to become that, I only ended up being your biggest weakness. Abandon me, for the welfare of yourself and the entire Indraprastha."

"Devi," he patted her cheeks. "Calm down, Love! Whatever has happened today was not because of you. Pray, stop blaming yourself thus!"

"How long would you keep denying the truth?" She cried out through a broken voice. "Had it not been for me, then why had you not given death sentence to the Rajadrohi yet? Why didn't you punish that arrogant King who dared to throw accusations at you in your very court?"

Yudhishthira's eyes averted her sharp gaze. Devika heard him sigh.

"I did not want to hurt you."

"And yet you say that it's not me who causes your weakness?" She frowned.

Yudhishthira did not speak.

"For what would you not hurt me, Maharaj? For what should you care for my feelings? I could not get you the alliance of Shivi, neither could I give you the love of my natal family. My brother has maligned your name to your own people. My father is accusing you in front of your very court."

She paused to catch a breath, finding that he was calmly listening.

"Any King in this situation would have abandoned the wife causing him trouble. Why can't you do the same to me? What expectation do you still have from me? What do I have, Ajatashatru, to deserve you in my life?"

Yudhishthira slowly raised his eyes.

"You have yourself, my warrior Queen! Your wisdom and courage are more precious to me than your kingdom's alliance. And trust me, your entire family's hostility is nothing in front of the love and care you have for me and my people.

"I did not marry you in expectation of Shivi's alliance, Devika. I knew your father would never like me winning your hand. Still I went to your swayamvara, uninvited by your father, because I wanted you. Only you, the wise warrior Queen of my land. I never expected to get anything more than that, and neither do I need so."

The teardrops Devika had suppressed for so long finally flowed through her fair cheeks.

"You are a gem of women, Devi." Yudhishthira smiled now. "Even a hundred of alliances would never equal you. Because kingdoms can be conquered by weapons. Not a precious woman's heart."

"Don't weaken me anymore, Natha!" She shook her head, pressing his arms. "I cannot see you lowering yourself for my sake. I cannot see people remarking that Dharmaraj Yudhishthira is neglecting his duties in love of a woman. I cannot cause your infamy, my love! For the sake of your and our Indraprastha's welfare, I have to go!"

"Who said you lowered me, Maharani? Rather you have lifted me whenever I felt low today. You have shown me the way of Dharma when I failed to find one."

Devika looked up, unconvinced.

"You heard me right. Have you not been by my side today, I might have given up to your father's unfair demand. But you didn't let me weaken in front of him, in front of all." He moved closer and cupped her tear-soaked cheeks. "It's you who saved my honour today."

"Is this true?" Her eager eyes met his calm ones, searching for the answer in them.

"Do I ever lie?" His eyes sparkled.

"How could you even thought of leaving me when I need you the most, Maharani?" Yudhishthira spoke again. "Do you remember that you have accepted Shivi's challenge of war? How will I win in absence of this Rajyalakshmi of mine?"

Devika stared at him unblinking. The warmth of his loving gaze, the love in his tone had melted the barrier in her heart. All her resistance was gone, her pale, dried lips shivered in uncontrollable tears. She finally collapsed into his arms, sobbing. Yudhishthira's hand reached out to pat her back.

"But you will be punished, Maharani." Smile sparkled through his brown eyes as he caressed her locks. "You wanted to leave me. I will bind you tighter to my existence. The new bond will be so strong that you will never again be able to think of departing."

He kissed her tear-showring eyes. Her melted kohl smeared his lips as if he had drank the poison of pain from her heart. Devika threw her face against his broad chest, wrapping her arms tight around him, finding shelter in her loving sanctuary once again. His spear-bruised rough fingers caressed her soft back, undoing the knot of her garment with their passionate stroke. The silken robe fell off of her shoulder, letting the two bodies merge into one.