Empty Spaces

Chapter 47

"Herr Potter," Holmberg's wand appeared on Harry's open textbook, "Come on up to my desk."

With a sinking feeling, Harry ignored Hermione's sympathetic eye and begrudgingly followed Holmberg to the front of the classroom, all sorts of miserable scenarios running through his head.

"It is not my business to be involved in the personal lives of my students," Holmberg began gently, "But I know you all have them nonetheless."

"I know, I know, I need to leave it at the door," Harry shook his head, disappointed at his own lack of willpower. It had been a strategy that worked wonders for him, at least up until now."

"Ja, ja, that is true," Holmberg nodded his agreement, "And now, let me also tell you this, Herr Potter. There will be times in your life when you have to, how do you say, 'tough it out'? But there are also times when that is not necessary. I have seen you in my class all year, and I have seen the work you deliver. I will not ask what is troubling you today, for it is not my business to know, but I will say that if you would like to come in another day and make up today's work, that is something we can do. Life is all about balance, after all. Everyone is allowed to have bad days, even you." Holmberg gave Harry a small smile of understanding.

Even you.

Harry nodded. This wasn't the pity or free passes that he'd come to despise– Holmberg had specifically said Harry would have to come in and make up the work. But it was also permission to fail, at least for today. During the war, failure meant lives lost– whether it was his friends or a complete stranger or even his own. Death is death and a person is a person. But today was just another class, it was just another potion, and today, he could fail if he needed to.

"Thank you Professor," Harry finally managed to get out, "I think it'll be okay, though. I've got over an hour left, I'll just start again."

"You do not have to," Holmberg supplied gently.

"I know," Harry nodded, finding his voice, "But I think I'll just start again. Thank you, though, I really do appreciate it."

"Do not hesitate to let me know if you change your mind," Holmberg said, gesturing that it was time for Harry to return to his seat. Harry nodded, a sense of resolve now taking over. Everyone is allowed to have bad days, even you. Just the fact that he could made all the difference in the world.

"Everything okay?" Hermione whispered out of the corner of her mouth as Harry slid back into his spot.

"Yeah," Harry replied vaguely, casting a vanishing spell at his disaster of a potion and calming his nerves. Everyone is allowed to have bad days, even you. "I'm just going to start over from the beginning, there's no saving this mess..."

Hermione nodded her understanding and left Harry alone to focus on his work, returning to her own cauldron. By the end of class, Harry managed to scrape together something that at least resembled the description in his book and while it didn't shrink his mouse anywhere near as small as Hermione's, it was still one of the smaller mice in the clear jar on Holmberg's desk.

"Ah, wunderbar, Herr Potter," Holmberg nodded his approval, "The makings of a fine Zaubertrankbrauer indeed."

"It's not anywhere near as good as Hermione's," Harry shook his head in disapproval at his work.

"Ah, but by comparing yourself to others, Herr Potter, you will get to nowhere fast," Holmberg corrected, "There will always be someone who seems 'better' than you. Not just in Potions, but in life. The thing to do is to compare yourself only to yourself. Now, look at what you brewed at the beginning of the lesson and compare that to what you have just turned in now. You see the improvement? That is what I am looking at, Herr Potter, the improvement. As I said, a fine Zaubertrankbrauer."