FOR SOME REASON I LOVE YOU

COCKROACHES SHOULD BE EXTINCT (HOW DO THESE GIGANTIC ONES NOT FLY)

"I"M IN THE BATHROOM!" You yelled.

"STAY SAFE!" Shinpachi yelled back.

"You too!" You called back, scanning through the cabinets and finding another can of cockroach repellent. You had protection. It probably wouldn't work very well... but it would fare better than Yorozuya, you were sure.

As they moved out and attacked the bug, you left the bathroom, carrying around your repellent,- just in case- as you went about your morning with everyone yelling in the background. Of course, the cockroach had to be dealt with... but you had work. And that was important. And definitely not an excuse to leave your roach infested home. 

"We killed it!" You heard Kagura exclaim. She came running to the seating area and grinned widely. "We killed it Y/N-chan!"

"Good for you Kagura!" You replied with the same enthusiasm. "Gin!"

"Yeah?!"

"Get the thing out by the time I get back alright?!"

"Yeah, yeah!"

"Alright, I'm leaving for work now!" You said as you slid the door open to leave.

And then a hoard. What felt and looked like millions of gigantic cockroaches came inside. You screeched, hopping back, and dragging the frozen Kagura along with you as you ran away.

"What's wro"- and another screech, as Gintoki saw the cockroaches right behind you and Kagura. Gintoki ran into Kagura's closet and jumped in, picking up Kagura from your arms. You yelled again, backing up as the cockroaches came closer. "Come on Y/N!"

You quickly jumped up, Gintoki hovering his hand over your head so you didn't hit the ceiling. He moved back to give you space to move and sit next to him. Kagura was going insane, and Gintoki was keeping the cockroaches at bay with his foot.

You were close to puking.

"Oi, Kagura-chan, snap out of it!" Gintoki yelled at Kagura, as she started counting... cockroaches.

You screeched again, as you saw a cockroach- the normal size- in the small closet. "Gin, Gin, kill it, kill it quickly!"

"Hm?" Gintoki grabbed onto the cockroach, and you (on the verge of crying) moved back against the wall. "What's this? Why's it say Goro?"

"WHO CARES, GET RID OF IT!"

"Alright, alright. I won't kill it though, it might get us some good karma with the roaches."

"JUST KILL I- and you've thrown it, alright, great."

"Huh?" He frowned. "What's with that attitude? If you want it killed, you kill it."

You clicked your tongue. "Oi, listen here, I don't pay the rent because you're my husband, I pay it so you get off your ass and do some work, bug exterminating comes with that."

As Gintoki opened his mouth to make a come back, the door broke down. What a shocker. Author-chan couldn't come up with a witty reply and let something interrupt. It's been a while since she'd interrupted, please don't forget about her, she's still here, hi, hello.

"Gin-san!" Shinpachi called. "I, Shinpachi, have returned!"

You peeked your head outside, and saw Shinpachi exterminate the cockroaches with a giant spray. Gintoki got one and started helping out. You, still sort of traumatized, sat still in the closet, waiting for them to get rid of everything. They didn't have enough of the spray cans anyways, so you wouldn't really be much help.

"These things are everywhere," Shinpachi commented. "They're making the city go crazy. There are pickled seaweed cockroaches crawling all over the city."

You raised your brows at that name. Probably missed some scene.

"We're in trouble. If they found out it was our fault, they'll chop our heads off."

You weren't surprised it was their fault.

"There's a strange rumour going around," Shinpachi continued. "Something about these being man eating cockroaches that came from space to take over Earth. And the world is doomed unless we kill the queen cockroach, with 'Goro' written on it's back. Man, people will believe in anything!"

"Shinpachi-kun... say that again."

"Like I said, these are man eating cockroaches and unless we kill the queen roach that has Goro written on it's back, the Earth is doomed."

Huh?

Huh?

Huh?

"GINTOKI!"

And then Gintoki went insane. Laughing like crazy. You were frozen as he continued laughing, taking Kagura who had fallen asleep and leaving, still giggling to himself.

Shinpachi then chased after him.

Leaving you alone. With the beasts.

You paused. Nothing happened.

"Gintoki?"

You held your breath, waiting. What were you going to do? Would you have to wait here till they rot? Would they just leave? Would they find a way into the close-

"Gintoki!"

Then it moved, the thing moved, making a squishing sound.

"GIN TAKE ME WITH YOU!!!"