The Dawn of Time (Bl) - English version

Chapter 13 - my first celebration

I let my gaze wander around the room. The atmosphere was lively and laughter filled the air. Tatsuya was engaged in conversations with a group of people and when he noticed my gaze, he smiled and passed me a plate of delicious appetizers. I grabbed a few strips of dried meat and enjoyed the hearty taste. In that moment, Sir Valerian wrapped his arm around my shoulders and leaned in, calling out loudly, "To our talented healer!" The other knights echoed his words and raised their mugs in agreement. I followed and raised my own beer mug.

Suddenly, a maid approached me with tears in her eyes. She spoke with a trembling voice, "I thank you sincerely. Because of you, my child will grow up with a father". As she spoke, one of the knights approached her and embraced her. "Wait, you're going to be a father, Felix?!" exclaimed a cheerful, slightly tipsy knight from across the room. Felix nodded shyly and replied, "Yes, we're going to be parents!" The crowd erupted in congratulations. "To impending parenthood!" someone shouted from the crowd, and everyone raised their mugs once again to toast the forthcoming joy.

I too began to feel a sense of joy and merriment. We drank and engaged in lively conversations. The alcohol worked its magic, melting away my nervousness and shyness, and I felt at ease in the midst of this company. Suddenly, the former one-eyed knight who sat with us at the table expressed his envy of impending fatherhood. Laughter erupted among the others, and I joined in, sharing in the amusement.

Then, the slightly tipsy Sir Valerian turned to me with a mischievous grin and asked, "Tell me, young healer, is there a woman in your life?" Those words caught me off guard and I nearly choked on my drink. "No, there is no one", I replied abruptly, feeling a hint of embarrassment as all eyes were on me. Sir Valerian patted me on the back and said, "Hmm, well, you're still young, after all".

Then, one of the knights asked curiously, "But surely there must be someone who interests you? Or what type of person do you prefer?" All eyes were fixed on me, and I took a moment to ponder. "Well, he should be tall, with broad shoulders, strong arms, and thick hair," I said, unaware that I was staring intently at Tatsuya. Blushing, I lowered my head and took a hearty sip from my mug.

Suddenly, the room fell silent. "The healer prefers men?" someone whispered quietly and the silence grew even more oppressive. In that moment, I made a decision. "Yes, I am attracted to men!" I exclaimed proudly, speaking out loud for the first time in front of so many people. It felt empowering to declare my truth, and I didn't care about the consequences that might follow, likely fueled by the effects of alcohol.

Sir Valerian choked on his beer, taken aback by my sudden loud proclamation. Tatsuya, too, looked at me with surprise. The knights stared at me in silence for a moment, then they raised their mugs once again and clinked them together. It was a sign of recognition and acceptance and I felt a weight lifting off my shoulders. In that moment, I felt stronger and freer than ever before.

The festivities continued in their joyful course, and I could feel tiredness slowly creeping up on me. My eyelids grew heavy and when I opened them again, I realized that my head was already resting on Tatsuya's shoulder. Quickly, I straightened up and rubbed my eyes, determined to stay awake. A soft laughter reached my ears and Tatsuya stood up. He reached out his hand to me, his smile gentle. "Come, I'll take you to your room", he said compassionately.

Raven, who stood at the edge of the table, offered, "I can accompany him to his room, Your Grace". However, Tatsuya shook his head. "That won't be necessary", he replied and reached out his hand to me. I took hold of it and stood up, but suddenly I felt unsteady on my feet. Everything began to spin and I felt a support at my hip. Tatsuya held me firmly and before I knew it, I was safely cradled in his arms. A wave of embarrassment washed over me and I lowered my head to hide my flushed cheeks. "If you don't hold on, you might fall", Tatsuya joked and his words brought a smile to my lips. I clung onto him tightly, feeling the strength and power in his arms. Together, we continued walking towards my room and I couldn't help but gaze at his face brightened by the gentle moonlight.

Suddenly, a feeling of insecurity washed over me. "Aren't you disgusted by me?" I asked softly. Tatsuya stopped and looked deep into my eyes. "Why would I be disgusted?" he replied seriously. "Because I'm attracted to men," I whispered quietly. Silence enveloped us as we locked eyes. But then, Tatsuya broke the silence and said simply, "That doesn't bother me". A sense of relief flooded through my body and we continued on our way.

The night air was pleasantly cool as we strolled slowly through the castle corridors. The soft moonlight accompanied us, casting a romantic ambiance over our surroundings. My heart pounded wildly in my chest and I could feel the magnetic pull between us. Yet, I hesitated to make the first move. Instead, I allowed myself to be carried by the security of his touch and the comfort of his arms. Emotions swirled within me and I wondered if I was the only one feeling this way.

Finally, we arrived at my room and Tatsuya gently released his hold on me, pausing for a moment. Our gazes met once again and I could see desire and affection in his eyes. It was a moment filled with possibilities and unspoken words.

A moment of silence passed between us as we drew closer, our lips just inches apart and I could feel his breath on my skin. It was a moment of magic, electrifying the air between us.

Softly, the door behind me creaked open, and a gentle breeze brushed against us as he gazed into my eyes. There was a hint of regret in his gaze as he softly uttered the words, "Good night". Slowly, our faces moved away from each other and I could sense the lingering scent of his breath in the air. A wave of desire and longing washed over my body. I bit my lip, attempting to contain the rising emotions within me. With each step he took away from me, a mixture of excitement and melancholy spread through me.

I couldn't help but watch him for a moment longer as he disappeared into the darkness. The silence was only interrupted by the pounding of my heart. I buried my face in the cool pillow, seeking relief for my restless thoughts. The sensations that Tatsuya had awakened in me were overwhelming yet intoxicating. Every moment in his presence felt precious and I felt more alive than ever before.