The Broken Man [ z.m. ]

Chapter 1

AGAIN THE WRITING GETS BETTER & PLEASE EXCUSE THE SMALL MISTAKES

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Zayn's POV

It was yet another day. Another day where i would get up and lay in my bed for hours staring at the ceiling unless there were any interviews or shows. I would let my thoughts get the best of me. I was doing a lot of thinking these days. It scared me to be honest. I felt lonely in this massive house. The silence was eating me alive and my head was pounding. I opened my eyes to be hit immediately by the sunlight that was seeping through the thin material of the curtains on the other side of the room. I inwardly groaned because of the sudden pressure and tangled my fingertips with my hair. I just wanted to rip my head off to make the pain go away. I don't know whether it was the alcohol which was still swarming in my body or just the empty feeling around me that made my head hurt. After having an inner battle i finally convinced myself it was probably the hangover from last night. 

This was my life now. On days when there was no work, i would go to the bar just down the street and get drunk. It was a small shabby place in a basement. Only hobos ever came there which is why i liked it. No one knew me and I knew no one. I would go there when i felt sorry for myself which was every day. Nothing seemed to get better and life just seemed like a big drag. It kept on going and going and nothing ever happened. A loud buzz shook me out of my string of thoughts as i turned to the side of my king sized bed. I reached for my phone that was placed on the dresser when i noticed a glass of water and an Advil beside it. Since when did my maid start caring about me? She was never allowed in the room which explained the mess around me. But none of the maids were allowed to even step inside my room let alone place water & medicine for me by my bedside. 

Another buzz awoke me from my thoughts and in a swift movement; i grabbed my phone and pressed the answer button without bothering to look at the caller ID. A sharp pain shot through the back of my head causing me to grunt as I said hello to the person who called me at the worst time ever. 

"Good afternoon sleeping beauty! I hope you had a wonderful night getting drunk and shit." Greeted Louis.

I never understood how a person could be so cheerful in the morning but i guess it wasn't morning for him. Never the less, his voice still irritated me. Everything irritated me.

"What do you want Louis?" I grumbled.

"What's gotten your knickers in a twist? Haven’t you had your Advil yet?" Sneered Louis.

"Piss off, will you? And no I haven't, how do you know I'm hung-over anyways?"

"All you do is get drunk, don't you? Louis retorted. I ignored his comment as he continued. "Well, you see we are supposed to have an interview today and i was calling you yesterday but you didn't pick up the phone. So I took the liberty to come to your noble abode and tell you but you were passed out on the floor with an empty vodka bottle beside you. I dragged your drunken ass to your room and left you some Advil so when i called i wouldn't have to listen to Mr. Grumpy Pants but i guess I wasn't lucky enough."

Great, what a way to ruin my relaxing day. "Whatever man, I thought today was a free day. What happened to that?" I replied once again ignoring his comments.

"We all don't get what we want, do we zaynie? Now get you're lazy arse up and get ready, I'll be there to pick you in an hour because I’m sure no one else would want to deal with a hung-over Zayn." Before giving me the chance to reply, the line went dead as i was left alone once again.

It was weird that I talked to Louis like this. The last time I saw the lads was almost a week ago and even when we did meet, it would be those 4 cracking jokes while i would be alone in the other corner listening to music or lost in my thoughts. Mostly lost in my thoughts. We hardly had a proper conversation now. All of the boys were distant now. I guess i pushed them away so many times that they were tired of chasing me. Louis was probably the only one who would sometimes call me to check up on me if we were away from each other for more than 2 weeks. I guess he was the only one who still thought that there was a chance of the old Zayn to return. A chance of his old brother to return. His best friend. But i knew better, there was no chance. He was gone and i never felt better. Even though i was a bitch, i still liked it. I wasn't the shy, unconfident boy anymore. I was strong, assertive and I spoke my mind no matter if it hurt anyone's feelings or not. I was heartless.

Sluggishly, I pushed myself fully off the bed and dropped the duvet on the floor. Kicking it out of my way, I dragged my feet towards the washroom. It was pretty huge you could say. After all I was a celebrity so why not use the money to my advantage. Quickly after taking a shower, I left my fringe hanging on to my forehead, knowing that it made my fans swoon over me even more. Most of them were pretty crazy to say the least, more of a reason to stay away from them. I was pathetic. Casually strolling out of my room, I took in the sight before me. The living room was a mess and there were alcohol bottles everywhere. I thought Louis said there was only one bottle and where were the maids. Oh right, they only came in when I wasn’t home so I would call them up after I leave. This was the mess I made yesterday. My days were filled with alcohol to fill the empty feeling but it never seemed to let go. Skipping over the mess, I made my way over to the kitchen to find myself something to eat. The fridge held the basics but there was no real food. There used to be no food in the house because of Niall mostly. He ate everything and the lads would come hang out at my place. But now, no one came. Not even my family. I don’t remember the last time I’d seen them. Maybe it was 5 months ago or 6. Thinking about my family made that empty feeling return once again, as I shook my head to make it empty of all thoughts. It didn’t help. Sighing, I grabbed a carton of orange juice & chugged it down. No one ever ate here except for me anyways so why bother using glasses.

Time was going too slow for my liking as I flipped through the channels to find something to watch. I stopped on a celebrity gossip channel and yet again they were showing my face. Surprise, surprise. They could never leave me alone. They were saying something about my latest flip out in a restaurant where they took a candid of me screaming at Liam. No paparazzi were supposed to be there. It was just a dinner right after our tour and once again, Liam was pestering me about my behavior. That lad needed a break. It was our usual, he would scream, I would scream back. He would scream some more and I would tell him to piss off & leave. Nothing new. Irritated, I switched the TV off and right on time, the doorbell echoed through the house.

Taking long strides towards the door, I swung it open and there stood Liam. We were still on rocky terms after that argument in the restaurant. But again, I was always on rocky terms with all the lads.

“Louis picked all of us to go the interview together. I hope you don’t mind but frankly I don’t care if you mind.” Liam said flatly before turning on his back and walking away to the car that was parked outside the driveway. I guess he was still mad. Stepping out of the door and locking it, I texted the maids to clean the place. I didn’t even know their names. Management had hired them and I was just supposed to tell them when to clean. Life was easy when you were a celebrity. As I got to the car, the doors swung open and inside were the rest of the boys of One Direction. No one exchanged hellos and no one spoke a word. To me.  They were all too busy talking together and were doing a perfect job at ignoring me. Well today was going to be just like any other day with my “brothers”.

Today was going to be a long day.