Laws of e(Motion)

Six: #647792

"Oh, yeah of course," she said, before turning back to Zane. "Sorry, I guess I accidentally double booked myself."

"There will be other days, you're always welcome. We're friends," he smiled, calming Emilia yet again when he wasn't mad at her. "Right?" He seemed as anxious as she was about establishing that.

"Yeah, we are." Emilia's smile conveyed the enthusiasm she was scared to put into her words. Making a new friend and the clarity Zane provided with that were more than she could've hoped for in her last year of high school, and upon moving into two new classes. Clara grabbed her arm. "I'll see you later Zane!"

Their usual spot in the library was always quiet at lunchtimes, hence why they'd adopted it, Emilia could just about tolerate the ticking sound of the clock on the wall behind her for a lunch break, before the repetitiveness and pitch of the sound broke her to a panicked mess. Gentle lo-fi music through her headphones was enough to muffle the sound of Clara's frustrated page turning, and jabbing of her calculator so hard that Emilia was surprised she hadn't destroyed it yet.

"Did you get question eight right?" Clara demanded. It wasn't really a question, but a request for a correct answer that Emilia had adjusted to over the years of knowing her.

"I got three of the four marks," Emilia admitted, anxious like Clara had a knife to her throat and her life depended on having all four marks, "but I'm pretty sure I know where the fourth one was, if you want me to explain it?"

"You don't have a mark scheme?" There was a correct answer to every question Clara asked, even if it wasn't the honest one. Especially if it wasn't the honest one, in cases like this.

"No, but I emailed Mr Treverton about it last night, and I'm pretty certain I've got it now," Emilia explained with slightly different phrasing, unsure how else to communicate that she could fully answer the question now, even if she hadn't got it completely right the first time she'd tried it. "I can get that email up if you want?" She started loading her email app up, easily finding the email in question before Clara could reply.

"I'll just find a mark scheme later," Clara said, dismissing any more attempts at the question. "Did you get any of the paper right?" Sometimes her bluntness felt purely insulting.

"The front pages were both fine," Emilia said as she flicked through her paper. The first few pages were a warm-up of multiple choice questions, most people had got all of them right. The rest of her paper was made up mostly of all marks but one. Her grades in physics were good because of her understanding, not her articulation and ability to remember keywords.

"I meant any that I didn't get." According to Clara that was supposed to be obvious, and Emilia could only quieten and internalise her frustration at herself for not understanding that.

"Not completely, but maybe I got something you didn't? And vice versa?" she offered. Realistically Clara would never accept it, but Emilia was too optimistic that one of her ideas would be good enough. "It's mostly the electrical topic I didn't get, everything else is okay." The electrical topic was still her least okay section, and it was probably best if she was open with Clara about that.

"You really loved proving me wrong in class but now you won't help me get it right?" Clara asked. Her obvious expectation was for Emilia to agree, that she was intentionally withholding information to sabotage her friend, but she wasn't going to admit to something that wasn't true. She also refused to believe what Clara was saying, when she was offering every solution she could think of. "Some friend you are, you just like seeing other people struggling while you get to be perfect." And with that as her final cutting remark, Clara messily shoved all her papers into her bag and moved to work at another table across the room. Emilia sighed heavily, the only relief from her friend's outburst being the near completed physics paper in front of her. Without Clara's help it wouldn't be as easy, but would still definitely be more than possible. Her biggest obstacle now wasn't correcting the paper, but forcing away the horrible social anxiety and overthinking of every word she'd said so she had room in her mind for physics concepts. She turned her music up a little louder, resetting the length of her mechanical pencil, and wiping the tears from her eyes so she could see the words in front of her, trying to avoid looking at Clara and focus on the soft beats in her headphones over the sound of the clock.