I'll admit it. From the outside looking in me and Draco do not have a healthy relationship. We've been together for three years now. We really do love each other a lot, we just both have very similar personalities when it comes to affection. We argue all the time but we always make up at the end. What other people may view as toxic I love it.
The dining hall is quiet. It's Christmas break and most families have taken their children home where they can relax outside of the confinements of school. Myself, Draco, Blaise and some other close friends were the only ones that had bothered to stay at Hogwarts for the break. Draco didn't want to deal with his father and I didn't want to deal with my mother. We both shared our distaste in our parents and somewhat bonded over it.
We were sitting beside each other eating in silence. Our elbows were close enough to touch but we were both going about our own business as usual.
" You two are so strange" Blaise mused looking up from his dinner to stare at us. He made this same comment every other week. " I mean you guys are so cold toward one another" he sighed as if it weren't something to be proud of.
" I don't think cold is the right word" I said continuing to eat my meal.
"Your certainly not all over each other or anything is all I'm saying" he continued. I didn't even look up from my plate.
" And what is it you would prefer we do Zabini?" Draco asked harshly.
" I don't know? Maybe talk to one another?" He suggested unaffected by Malfoys unfriendly nature.
" We do talk" he said.
" Not in front of me you don't." He continued. It was almost as if our relationship was the schools most interesting topic. Everybody needed to get over it. Me and Draco were old news.
" Blaise what's the last relationship you were in? Oh right you haven't been in one. And ours has lasted three years so I certainly don't think your one to talk" I snapped shutting him up entirely. Draco gave my knee a squeeze of approval under the table. I shifted my gaze to see him smiling slightly in amusement. It's moments like these that people don't notice.
A few minutes past and we had all cleared our plates. We made our way back to the common room slowly. It was sort of nice having the castle to ourselves with everyone gone.
Blaise flopped himself on the sofa in front of the fire with a friend he made in potions. Me and Draco made our way to the dormitories. Because Draco is a prefect he gets his own room. I have my own room of course but I also have a collection of close in Draco's closet as well as some other random belongings. Right now I'm itching to get into something more comfortable.
" Can I borrow one of your sweaters?" I asked as we rounded the corner and headed towards the boys rooms.
" borrow or steal?" He asked seriously. I still can't figure out when he's joking or not.
" mmm depends on which one you give me" I said truthfully.
" Welk maybe I just won't give you one at all" he snapped. However when we entered his room the first thing he did was go to his closet and pull out a sweater for me. He gave me his best one too.
That's the sort of thing that let me know he loves me. The harsh comments followed by a small act of affection.
I don't bother saying Thankyou because I already know he doesn't want to hear it.
I pull the sweater on over my head and steal his sweatpants before plopping down with a book on his bed. He pretended to look annoyed by my presence but I know that if I were anywhere else expect his bed he would be pissed right now.
I read and he works on his studies and we just sit in silence.
" Dray?" I whisper. It's been about a half an hour and I can't tell if he's actually reading or just staring at his page at this point. " I'm tired" I sigh.
" okay." He takes the book from my hand and sets his own down on the coffee table. He pulls back the sheets and flicks out the lights. It's early to go to bed but tomorrows Christmas so why not get some extra sleep?
I lean into him placing my head on his chest. He carefully puts an arm around my waist.
" Do you think I'm cold?" He asked. I was a little bit taken aback by the absurdity of his question.
" No of course not. Don't let idiots get in your head" I said.
" No I mean towards you. Do you not think I show that I care about you enough?" I'm almost gasp in shock. This whole conversation is ridiculous.
" Dray I know you love me. And you know I love you. It's okay to not be super affectionate. I'm not either. It's the small things that matter" I said leaning up and kissing him.
" Yeah your right"
******
" Good morning darling. Merry Christmas" he said waking me up. Sun poured into my eyes and my view immediately went to the window where I could see snow falling.
" Merry Christmas." I say sitting up and hugging him. He tenses for a moment before melting into it and putting his face in my neck. He's never been much if a hugger but he'll make an exception for me.
" Want to open your gift now or later?" He asks still hugging me.
" We can give our gifts now just let me run and grab mine from my room" i said. " Also you got me a gift?" I asked in pure shock.
" Of course. Do I not every year?" He asked genuinely wondering if he was loosing his mind.
" Nono you do it's just I over heard you saying you weren't buying anybody presents this year. I got you a gift anyway though" I laughed.
" I did say that but that doesn't apply for you." He said kissing my forehead.
I left the room and quickly grabbed my present from my dorm. I had picked it out forever ago and I've been just dying to give it to him.
He insisted that he go first.
" it's not much" he said handing me a small box. I could already tell he was lying. I know that he comes from a rich family but I really don't want him spending money on me.
I slowly opened the first small compartment to reveal a necklace. It had a D and an R on it. Both of our initials together. I flipped it over in my hand and read the date on the back. It was the exact day and year we first started dating. I began to thank him but he told me that there's more. He slid a second box into my hand. It was a lot smaller than the first and was held shut by a silk black ribbon.
I opened it to reveal a ring. It looked so expensive I was afraid to even put it on.
" Dray..." I have no words. This is the most thoughtful gift I've ever received from anyone.
" It's a promise ring." He said dining his excitement at my pleased reaction.
I didn't know how to say Thankyou so I wrapped my arms around him and hugged him tight. He tensed for a moment before hugging me back. I leaned up on my tip toes and kissed him gently before handing him his gift.
It was also two things. The first thing was an enchanted book that allowed him to replay any moment of his life like a movie in front of him. I also got him a book filled with pictures of us and a fancy tie as well. The gist he got me seems far more meaningful but I could tell by the look on his face the present I had given him was more than enough. His eyes were glowing with joy with every item he opened.
I refuse to believe my boyfriend is cold hearted or mean. He is by far one of the most carding people I've ever met. He just doesn't always know how to show it and he certainly doesn't like sharing that side of him with very many people. But I love him and he loves me so that's really all that matters.
