Invisible String

Chapter One- Time, Curious Time

She'd had dreams before that were so vivid, it was difficult to believe they weren't real. Likewise, she had suffered from terrible nightmares for years; a biproduct of unresolved trauma and they also had felt very, very real.

This wasn't familiar. No feeling unsettled or confused. There was a warmth that settled over her, a renewed sense of calm. She was interested in unpacking what it could mean (chalking it up to the insatiable curiosity she'd developed as a kid), but she also believed what she was told, that she would understand it in time. 

Patience was a virtue, though, one she struggled with, especially if somehow this dream was connected to the bizarre waves of emptiness, of feeling like something was missing. 

She had to be in the studio by nine and seeing it was already seven, she showered and dressed quickly, running downstairs while toying in the forever internal debate; make coffee now or stop for it later.

The aroma hits her when she turns the corner to head into the kitchen. The decision's been made for her and she smiles, crossing her arms over her chest as she steps into the room.

"You're hurting today, aren't you?"

Natali's hunched over the breakfast bar, her face practically buried in a huge mug of black coffee. 

"Ugh, please stop talking so loud. The Advil hasn't kicked in yet."

"Sorry," she apologizes. "Here," she digs a bottle of water from the refrigerator, pushing it towards her sister, "this'll help more than the coffee."

"Thanks."

Natali takes a long sip, watching her as she pours herself a generous cup of coffee, taking the seat across from her.

"You look better than I feel. You must've had a good sleep."

Stefani shrugs, throwing some almond milk into the sea of ink. "First time in awhile I feel rested, so..."

"Mmm," she pinches the bridge of her nose. "Did you hear from David?"

There was the Natali she knew. Even hungover, she was on high alert. 

"Yeah, he texted last night."

She raises an eyebrow, "he didn't call? To see if you got home safe or anything?"

That was their dad peeking through and she sighs deeply. "It's fine, Natali. I'm a grown-up. David knows that. We don't need to keep constant tabs on each other. Besides, he's busy with business."

Letting Natali in on how bothered she was lately about what David did (or, more what he wasn't doing) is only going to open a can of worms that she's totally not up for, not now, possibly not in the foreseeable future, either.

Instead, seeing the wheels already start to turn in Nat's head, she swiftly changes the subject. "So, I had the weirdest dream last night."

"Oh," she's got Natali's attention, her dark eyes flashing, "a good dream or a nightmare? You're not still having those, are you?"

"No, not for months now. No, this wasn't a bad dream. It was nice, just bizarre. I can't seem to make sense of it."

"Let me hear it," Natali offers. She lifts up her phone, "we can find something to figure out what it could mean."

Her sister was incredibly accepting in that way, always willing to help, and she can't help but feel slightly guilty that she's keeping her in the dark about the way things have been lately.

Still, she forges ahead and explains the dream in detail, including the woman and the blue dress that was like holding air against her body. 

Natali's brow furrows as she listens intently, tapping her phone. "So, the strings were all connected? What color were they?"

"Red. And yeah, they were all connected...there had to be a million of them. I couldn't tell just by looking where one started and another one ended. It was just about the most beautiful thing I've ever seen, though. And the woman was so kind and patient with me. She seemed to sense that I didn't understand what I was looking at, but she told me that I would."

"Well," Natali glances up, "think I've found the answer. At least partly."

She hands Stefani the phone and she begins to read aloud, a dawning comes over her, begins low in her abdomen, creeping up into her sternum and across the expanse of her chest until it reaches her throat and then it's hard to swallow.

She speaks through the thickness. "Japanese legend says that everyone is tied to their soulmate via a red string on their pinky finger. It doesn't matter where we are born or what our circumstances are, people tied together with this string will find each other."

"Oh," Natali's face contorts when she stops reading, "so maybe the dream is just proof that you and David are meant to be or something."

Even as she says it, they both know the meaning doesn't quite fit and they grow silent. 

"Look, Stef," her sister tries to do damage control, "dreams are only as true as how much stock you put into them. It could mean a hundred different things...don't take this as the end all and be all."

But it made sense now...the interconnected red strings, the way the woman had told her to, "be patient," and that she didn't understand now, but "she would."

The blood rushes in her ears. Natali is speaking, but she can't hear her above the noise in her own head. If this is true, it means what's missing, for so long now, isn't a what but a who. 

They're out there somewhere, she covers her mouth. Maybe she's met them already, passed them on the street, bumped into them coming around a bend. Maybe she hasn't yet, because she'd know if she had.

And the most terrifying possibility of all: that just maybe she never would and she'd go through life with the knowledge that they were out there and there was nothing she could possibly do about it.

"The blue dress," she mutters to herself. It had to have some significance, but what?

The answers seem to be right within her grasp, as if she could reach up and grab them and right then and there, she makes a firm vow with herself to get them, no matter how long it takes.