Queer Tales of Tarot

Maud's Folly

I stood there in front of the Dean's door awaiting my fate. Oh right, forgot to knock. There was the quiet shuffle of footsteps on carpet as the Dean made his way to the door. Then, the door opened with a small creak that made me wince. There stood the Dean with a disapproving smile on his face, like he'd witnessed something embarrassing upon seeing me. I took a deep breath.

"You wanted to see me, Sir?"

"Yes, Maud, thank you for coming. Come in, come in." he gestured to the chair behind him.

The Dean sat behind his desk, a large pennant of the Southern Christian University hanging proudly on the wall at a jaunty angle completely inappropriate for the mood of the room. "I suppose you know why I've brought you here, Maud?"

I pretended I didn't. "Not really. Is something wrong?"

The Dean steepled his hands and stared off into the distance in the corner of the room. "We have certain standards here at Southern Christian University, and we don't tolerate certain behaviors. I know that all teenagers and young adults have certain urges, but at this University, we are expected to know better than to act upon them as they are cardinal sins."

"I still don't really know what you mean, Sir." I had an idea. A flash of a beautiful, fleeting memory. One kiss shared with Shelly Dupree. I could feel the heat in my cheeks.

The Dean looked down his nose at me, and I suppose he saw my cheeks flush. His eyes narrowed in disgust. He sighed. "You were witnessed fraternizing with another young female off campus."

By whom? "I don't put much stock in baseless accusations against me, Sir. Am I going to have a chance to defend myself or will you just believe anything you hear?"

"Several people witnessed the event, Maud. The accusations aren't baseless, your actions are baseless. They are grounds for your expulsion from the University."

"So, one harmless kiss, and I'm done?" My anger rose, always too quickly for my own good. It tends to take control of my mouth.

The Dean sat back, "I would hardly call it harmless. Your exploits have spread in a hush all over the University and you are threatening to sully our entire reputation as a Christian institution. I'm afraid an example will have to be made of you."

"Me?" I nearly choked. "I've heard the rumors of you and the young freshman boys, Sir." I nearly spat.

The Dean's face grew incredibly red, and I saw his hands form into fists on his desktop. I really thought he was going to swing at me, but just when I thought he would, a sly smile formed on his face. "You, Maud, are done here. You have one hour to gather your belongings, and then you will be escorted off the grounds by campus security. Goodbye."

And that was it. My life was done in that moment. I left, and thought about all the things I'd be losing by getting myself kicked out for one moment of stupid passion. My life's goal of becoming a microbiologist would be done. My parents couldn't afford another university, and besides, they were too conservative to send me anywhere else. I was done, I was done, I was done.

I took a bus to the station in our town, and had an awkward, quiet ride home with my father. He wouldn't dare broach the subject with me alone, because he's usually too concerned with being properly religious. We finally arrived at my parents' house, and my dad helped me bring all my belongings up to my old room. The whole time, my dad and mom both looked like a family pet had died despite never owning any pets.

Finally we sat down at the kitchen table, and let the silence fill the room. My mother eventually said the first words, "So, does this mean you're a lesbian now?"

I couldn't help but roll my eyes, because they didn't get the point of it all. "This isn't about my sexual orientation. This has nothing to do with that. I was on a track to get the career of my dreams, I was about to become a microbiologist, and that's all done now."