Intersecting Lines

Chapter 3

"I hate you." He told me without a glance. I can't believe this is happening. Is he bipolar? I'm really starting to think that the screws inside his head are really out of place.

"Listen, I came here to say sorry." I tell him honestly. There's no point in keeping my pride. I am wrong and if I am wrong, I have to say sorry. So you see, I'm not such a rebel. I'm just a little messed up right now. It looks like the word sorry caught his attention because for the first time in like 5 minutes, he looked at me.

"You did?" he looks stunned, like I told him a secret of some sort.

"Yes. I did. I understand why you hate me. I was inconsiderate last night for wanting to commit suicide. I now realize how much everyone in this place needed some more time and it was insensitive of me to waste mine." I'm not actually good at explaining myself but the thought is there. Besides, he looks like he would understand what I'm trying to say.

"Good thing that you realized. Because you see, it's stupid. People don't die because of suicide, they die from sadness." He told me as calm as ever. And although I don't fully understand what he means by that, I know now that suicide is really a stupid thing for anyone to do or think of.

"But know that I still hate you." He added and I shoot him a stare. He just looks back at me and stares right into my eyes. It's like he's saying that he said nothing wrong.

"I still hate you. I forgave the suicide part of you. But not the silent rebellion one." he gives me a smile, the one that start from the corner of his lips, telling me that he knows me deeper than I think.

"I don't know what you're talking about. But, that's that. I said my apologies and I don't think I would like to die any sooner. Even if you try to help me like last night." I'm trying to close this conversation now. I know I would lose with his persuasive reasons because he sounds so intelligent. He could actually pass as a lawyer.

"Help you?" he repeated like he misheard what I said, I just nod as an answer. He shook his head and smiled, "I wasn't trying to help you last night." He finished his sentence. Seriously, this guy has some serious psychiatric issues. He gave me the knife last night, brought me up here on the rooftop, and on top of that, he gave me pills to do overdose. And he told me countless times that he is not going to stop me from committing suicide. And now, this is what I get? I don't understand him.

He cleared his throat, "It's a trick. A technique used to people. It's called reverse psychology. I read it in a book I was totally into about a year ago. It is where you make it seem like you're helping that certain person to attain his or her agenda but you're actually dragging them away from it. It is like what I did to you. It may look like I was helping you to commit your suicide but I was saving you from the mess you're about to enter." He was saving me? In a yet another unconventional way called "reverse psychology". So he was actually tricking me into believing that I was being abandoned to the hands of death but I was actually being saved. I kind of make sense now. I thought he was such an unmannered guy who would allow a girl to die. But he is not. He's actually intelligent. I'm surprised.

"Why did you do it?" I asked him. I mean, we don't really speak to each other. He never glances my way when we're inside the ward. I don't even know his name for goodness' sake. So why would he help me? Why would he save me?

He took a deep breath and spoke, "I thought you needed some saving. I thought that you needed someone to listen to your suppressed cries at night, someone to understand the voices inside your head. And as weird as it sounds, I understood parts of you. And I knew that you were scared." I remain silent. We both remain silent. I close my eyes and feel the wind brush against my face, against my fingertips. It's so solemn. The awkward silence between us is now gone. And I feel like we're starting to communicate-really communicate. Not using sarcastic remarks or nods as responses but just channeling ourselves through the wind.

"You know, it's alright to be afraid. Nothing's wrong with that. Everybody gets scared. I get scared. But it just depends on how you deal with it." I smile for no reason. I would like to talk to people like him. I wish a lot more people would think like him. I could see him smile on the corner of my eyes. Maybe he liked the way I smiled at his words. And since my curiosity will probably bother me until midnight, I finally ask him.

"What's your name?" I slowly looked at his way to see him already looking at me.

"I'm Alex Kim. You are?" he was smiling at me. Not the creepy smile. He was friendly smiling at me.

"Sophie Park." I answered back. He nodded to himself still wearing the same smile.

"It's nice to finally know your name." he told me, I think he was about to tell me something when his phone rang. He answered the call and gave a short "okay" to the person on the other line. He stood up with his crutches and he gestured his hand towards me. I reached for it and we shake hands. He began to walk away when he suddenly turned around.

"Hey Sophie, don't die, okay? I'm having fun listening to your cries each night. Although you're keeping me up and I wish you would stop crying but... don't die." he smiled at me again and slightly waved his hand as a sign of goodbye. I smile to myself and think that he is not a psycho. He just thinks deeper than usual. And it's a good thing to know someone who does. Somehow, I guess, I understand Alex Kim.