Intersecting Lines

Chapter 3

"Hi Sophie, are you okay?" Mom puts her bag down on the floor. I can see that it's heavy. I know that it's heavy by the way she carried it going here. Staggering and following whichever direction the bag goes. Those are probably my clothes. Don't misinterpret me. It's true that I don't want to die anymore - at least not anytime soon. But that doesn't mean that my silent rebellion is off. I need to vent out my frustrations and as much as I am sorry for my mom, I can't help it. She's just too positive - too much sugarcoating that it makes me sick. And I'm sick and tired of feeling sick. So I answer her the way I've been answering for five weeks now.

"Yeah, I am." Short response but full of angst, I'm aware that I should at least pretend that I am, indeed, okay. But I can't, not today.

I saw him limping as he passed my bed on his way out of the ward when I darted my sight to other things who's not mom. And out of nowhere, every part of me wanted to follow him. I'm not sure what I need to say but I know I need to talk to him. Ask his name, maybe.

"Mom, I need to go out." Mom quickly dropped the things she's doing and helped me up to ride my wheelchair. And when I'm finally sitting on it, I went out of the ward without any words of gratitude for my mom.

When I was out of the room, he's almost by the elevator; I noticed that he's still wearing the same pajamas from last night, the blue stars and all. I halted and hid behind the wall so he won't notice that I'm following him. I know, it sounds stupid how I am now trailing after the guy who almost became my indirect murderer last night. A few seconds later, the elevator came and he limped his way in it. When I was sure that the elevator doors are closed, I got out of my obvious hiding place.

I pressed the arrow up button and luckily, the door to the other elevator opened and I wheeled myself in. A boy also rode the elevator with me. He was around 6 or 7 years old. He's got his dextrose with him and he is wearing a Donald duck sweater and a red beanie. He looks cute, but I know that he's sick. I knew that I was staring at him when he looked my way and gave me a full smile. I smiled back when I saw that he lost one of his front teeth.

"Ma'am what floor?" I had to look away from him and look at the lady wearing a blazer over her white long sleeves.

"Oh" I let the words hang for a moment. I don't really know where he went. But judging by what happened and where we went last night, he's probably in the rooftop with a bunch of other patients seeking for a little break with the sterile smell of the hospital. So I tell her where I'm going.

"Rooftop." I reply to her. I look at him again and this time, he spoke to me.

"Hi, I'm Josh Teller." He slowly said with a little husky voice. He must not be talking for a long time. I smiled at him and asked him how old he was. He raised six of his fingers and smiled at me.

The elevator came to a stop at the 8th floor. A doctor was waiting for Josh when the doors opened. I looked at his nameplate. He's Dr. Theodore Reynolds, an oncologist. I switch my eyes to Josh's direction and he waved goodbye to me, I just gave him a weak smile in return. He must have cancer. I'm certain he does. Now that I get to see this, I look back on what happened last night. I finally understand what the guy meant. And I can't help but be guilty from what I tried to do. After a few moments, the elevator dings and I realize that I am now in the rooftop. I go out of the elevator and scan the place. It didn't take much time for me to see him. He was sitting on one of the benches in the left side of the rooftop. I push my wheelchair forward until I'm beside him. There is silence between the two of us, like we never met. I wait for him to notice me but he continues to stare somewhere far away. It looks like he is in a daze.

"Hey." I managed to say. He didn't look my way but I know that he heard me. He isn't that much focused on staring far away now, "are you going to pretend you don't know me?" I awkwardly asked him. I don't know why but I feel like we were ex-lovers who accidentally met and now everything is totally, uncomfortably awkward.