Failures

I accepted the fact that he failed to notice I was dying a little bit inside whenever he doesn't tag along Leon's dates with me. He's the only incentive during my times with Leon and I know that says a lot about me but it says a lot about Leon too by choosing sundae as a dipping for his fries and gravy for his mango pie. I would never forgive that course of life and I would never forgive myself for acting like it's one of my favorite things about Leon, especially when he's present. I'll forever fail to make myself like it and once when he tried to feed me with the horrendous concoction I had to excuse myself to the restroom to save Leon from being incarcerated for my attempted murder.

I accepted the fact that he "finally" failed to be a loyal friend to Leon. Does your role as wingman ends when the guy you're helping ends up with the girl? I hope it doesn't. He needs to make sure Leon and I keep our love story going so he wouldn't get bad rates and reviews and other incompetent dudes would still hire his dating service. I want to believe he's just busy getting ahead of us with life but his loud and chaotic household says otherwise. I want to believe he's just trying to prepare so early for university applications but his room's light fails to pull an all-nighter these days. I want to believe he just got better things to do but how would I know? I'm not his friend. I'm just his friend's girlfriend.

I accepted the fact that he failed to appreciate my visit when he was sick. I was all clad with grandmother clothes to make him feel comfortable, warm and fuzzy—I even brought a casserole of porridge I made myself for the first time in my life 'cause every member of my family was never sickly, therefore was never in need of a food you don't have to chew—and the first thing he said when he opened his front door was "You're not with Leon?". I never would have guessed that he thought Leon and I have entangled intestines. I don't think I'm supposed to shackle my boyfriend with me and deprive him of quality time with some incompetent dudes who still seek dating assistances. I'm not really the type to get easily offended but when those first words of his were wrapped up with a "Thanks, but you shouldn't have." and a pair of clammy palms to accept my casserole before slamming the door shut, I swore while stomping home that I would never respond to his messages ever again even though the last time he sent one was aeons ago and was solely about his wingmanning job.

I accepted the fact that he failed to befriend me still when his and Leon's friendship got back to its old glory. I would have sworn he once addressed me as "Leona" as a teasing. I took that personally and decided to treat him like air, which is much worse if you really think about it because air is always there and if it's gone, you'll die. Eww.

I accepted the fact that he failed to apologize about being a jerk when he barged into our house one night without knocking thrice (he knocked twice so hard the knob rattled so I have no choice but to open the door but he also vehemently beated me to it). He looked practically deranged when he asked me "Where is she?!" and I didn't answer for a full five seconds to push him further to the edge and because the answer is so obvious I fought the urged to roll my eyes so hard that I could get a glimpse of my brain. "I'm here." I said in my mind. If he's finally got to his senses and found out that he's been head over heels about me ever since he embarrassingly wailed over spoiled ice cream as a snotty child, then I would very much derived intense joy from saying that he was already late... but it hurts 'cause he's not.

I begrudgingly accepted the fact that he failed to remain single.

I am still accepting the fact that he failed to maintain rapport with me... or rather, start a rapport with me. It was our highschool graduation party. I was very hopeful that we'd get to talk 'cause I'd finally have a reason to. I striked a conversation by asking, "Well... which university have you chosen?" even though I already know which 'cause Leon won't shut up about it and kept cajoling me into going there too, 'cause he's going there and can't bear to be apart from his best friend. I can't help thinking he loves him more than me... I can't blame him though.