Awkward

7

"What was that phone call about it you don't mind me asking?"

"My father. He's just him I guess. It's nothing."

"Ohh Umm okay."

"Hey Cory can you come over here for a second?" I just nod and excuse myself from the table.

"So we were talking, me and the coaching staff. We want you to play holding center mid since Julie and Carli aren't back to full strength just yet."

"Umm okay?" I question nervously. The second shoe in my head was inches away from dropping.

"Are you okay with that?"

"Yes ma'am." Quickly correcting myself.

"If you aren't comfortable we can always push back your first cap. I'm sorry to say that but we don't need another outside or center back and our front line is holding up well."

"Ohh, no ma'am. I'm sorry if my tone lead you to believe I didn't want to play. I'm happy to play anywhere if you'll let me. Can't wait to start." I add the end for security as she smiles knowingly.

"That is all Cory. Go eat we head to the stadium in an hour. There you will get your drink and do everything you need before warm ups."

"Thank you for the opportunity ma'am."

I stalk away, mentally kicking myself in the head. God I sounded ungrateful. I get back to my seat, opening my container. "So what was that about?" Tierna questions with a sorrowful gaze.

"I'm starting at center mid today."

"Ohh I thought you were going to say that your first cap got pushed."

"No. I'm still starting from what I heard."

"That's good. Now eat up." I nod stabbing my fork through the grey eggs. We sit in silence both picking at the food in the take out containers before getting dismissed. I throw away the emptied styrofoam containers on our way out.

I repack my suitcase and triple check my personal bag. Post game clothes, protein bar, water, wallet, earbuds, book, math textbook, journal I hadn't open in over a year- but couldn't take out of my bag in case of bad luck. And lastly my only truly superstitious item a baby blue ribbon tied in a perfect knot. My mother tied before she left. It was left on my bag the day I walked out of the house only to return to all her stuff packed and the family photos filled with fake smiles smashed to pieces against the carpeted stairs.

I grasp the dainty/delicate ribbon in between my fingers. Feeling the itchy fabric stick to my dry digits. The same deep pain as always corses through my veins, the hatred pulling at my bones.

"What's up Cory?" Kelley yells loudly in the too bare room.

I jerk away from the bag, my eyes stinging slightly from unshed tears. "Nothing." Mumbling defiantly.

"Ayy calm your tits. I was just asking you were all up in your own world and shit."

"Nah you're good." I mumble as I take my walkout gear. Tierna was still in the bathroom so I dressed in the room.

"God damn!" Kelley whistles as I dress.

"What?" My head tilting to the side.

"You're fucking ripped."

"What?"

"Like your body bro."

"You're a little too old. Not that that's a bad thing but you...."

"I'm joking."

"Okay...umm..."  did I offend her? How do I fix this? What did I just do? Why would I be so rude?