𝐈𝐍𝐊 - JAMIE CAMPBELL BOWER

17

And as if bestowing a secret, he takes a breath. "I think we're past apologies now. I just want you to talk to me," he murmurs, almost reaching for your hand to close the space between you, but he doesn't. "...Our emotions get the best of us at the worst times. Trust me, I know." His voice is firm and understanding and soft all at once. It's like velvet, soothing your skin and your ears, and it's more comforting than anything you've heard in your life. "So, if there's anything you ever want to talk about, just say the word and I'm here."

Silence overwhelms the space between you, save for the steady breaths of air passing through your lips. Even that sound was no match for the swarm of thoughts parading inside your head. Jamie looks at you patiently, not prying, not pushing--he waits for you to make the first move--to say the first word.

If only you knew what to say. You reach for the words, hoping they'll serve as a lifeline and pull you out of whatever hole you feel yourself falling into. There's nothing but utter silence. Inside and out.

Three words leave your lips. "I don't know."

You expect him to lash out at you, or sigh out of annoyance—even laugh in your face, but he doesn't. He only nods and it's not mocking, but thoughtful and tender. "That's okay too," he murmurs.

The need to thank him for his unconditional kindness overwhelms you, but you don't know how. You're upset with yourself, never having felt this helpless with your emotions before, but you truly did not know how to put this into words.

But you could try.

"Throughout my entire life..." you start, "I think I've had about two healthy relationships." You make sure to chuckle at the end, but that doesn't soften the blow of the statement. Considering that your relationship with your parents had always been rocky, and you didn't have many friends, it was no exaggeration. "And my friendship with Tom is one of them."

You don't make the note that Xander wasn't a part of that pair. Jamie seemed to put that together himself, though, he probably didn't know that the second was Kat. You wondered if he had any idea who Kat was when she was basically his... creator.

    You reach for his hand this time, giving him a friendly squeeze. "Now, you're the third," you say. "I really appreciate you, Jamie, thank you."

Jamie's eyes crinkle when he smiles. His skin is warm and smooth, as you had expected. "I appreciate you too." His cheeks grow the faintest red at your touch and you steadily pull away before the moment lingers any longer. If your actions affect him, he doesn't show it.

"How about we go get some snacks?" you prompt.

He raises a brow. "I think that sounds lovely."

    ✧ ˚ 　· 　　 .

"Jamie, don't you think you've had enough free samples...?" you ask, worriedly as you look over to the man beside you.

Fluorescent lights shine down and beam on your skin as the two of you stroll down the stocked aisles. At the moment, Jamie was happily tasting some sort of concoction on a small skewer. You weren't exactly sure what it was this time and you've long since grown used to that feeling. All you had to do was turn away for a moment and by the time you turned back, he'd have a brand new one. Now, he throws the stick away in a nearby bin, marking his eighth free sample.

"Why? No. If they're free don't you think we might as well take them?" he says, explaining it in a way that told you it was common knowledge to him. You chuckle to yourself, once again in awe of his way of thinking.