Little Angelfuck ☆ Kirk Hammett

xviii. face to face

"Fuck off, I need to not be sober right now."

As we walked down the long hotel halls, we passed Kirk and Lars' silent room, and I figured the exhaustion had hit them like a train too. James walked next to me, with every step his arm brushed against mine. We walked without a word until we walked out onto the busy street. The dark of the night had hit and so did the cold, and I felt extremely underdressed, closing my arms across my chest, just following James as he found a bar, the thought of how cold it was consuming my thoughts.

As we walked in the green paned doors, I was hit with the wariness of the heat in the place, and immediately saw the dance floor. "James! We gotta go!" I squealed dragging his arm toward the colorful crowd of people and lights bathing in each other to create new colors.

"No way sweetheart, I am not dancing." He yanked me to a stop, and I stomped my foot and pouted.

"What if we drown ourselves in shots" I smiled deviously, a similar one creeping up on his face.

"You're buying"

After 10 or 13 rounds, I'd lost count, I finally grabbed James, in more of a trying not to collapse way, and we wobbled our way to the dance floor. I'd pleaded and pleaded and forced him when I heard the feedback from the guitar of "I Wanna Be Your Dog" by The Stooges rang through the club.

"So messed up, I want you here. In my room, I want you here." Iggy pop sang, lights flashed, and we made our way to the middle of the mass of people, moving like waves, and danced with each other. My head felt light and I felt like I was floating yet at the same time being dragged down to the ground. "Now we're gonna be face-to-face, and I'll lay right down in my favorite place"

I smiled at James, mouthing along with drunken laughter and shouts of excitement. "And now I wanna be your dog... Now I wanna be your dog"

My laughter stopped from my gasp of James wrapping his arm around my waist and pulling me closer. He spun me around and laid his hands on my hips from behind, moving them with his. I smiled behind my shoulder, and his grip on my waist tightened, and he kissed my shoulder, and when no protest was made, kissed his way up my neck and across my jaw, smiling into my skin. I threw my head back and left my mouth agape, feeling everything and anything all in slow motion. I hadn't even had the power to process what was happening, but somehow James was leading me, hand around my waist, outside the bar. As we sat on a bench under a lampost, he pulled out a cigarette, placing it between my lips. After pulling one out for himself, he lit his, and after a puff, leaned into mine as he lit it with his, eyeing me the entire time.

"Listen Astra... I gotta tell you something," He said after he fiend his dart. I looked up at him and nodded in response. He continued, "I know you and Kirk have... something going on."

All the color drained from my face. He seemed to notice this, and instantly continued, "No, no... I think I'm the only one who knows. Don't worry,"

"Oh god," I muttered, starting to panic. "What do you want?"

He scratched his head, looking around. "Nothing, nothing. Just to take you to that bar over there," He pointed a ringed finger to my left, at a bar lit up in red and blue twisting into colors of purple. A sign overhead read "SAMHAIN BAR & GRILL", a group of punks gathered around in a circle outside. I turned back to James and nodded, and we got up to go to the bar, passing the group with neon dyed mohawks and teased, messy hair, eyeing us down with disgust. I avoided looking at them, just focused on getting back into the warm from heated bodies dancing and sweating all over the floor. 

I squinted my eyes to a sliver, the flashing bright lights a big change from the darkness of the fall night. After another two drinks off of James this time, I sat by the bar, bored. As I looked around the unfamiliar faces, a very familiar curly head of hair caught my eye, making his way passed people waving their arms and legs everywhere. I followed him not too far behind, muttering sorrys and excuse mes, trying to keep up with the head of hair leading away from me.

After trying to squeeze past dancing people unsuccessfully, I lost the head of hair I knew so well. I lost James, too. Fuck, I'm really fucking screwed. I was too drunk to think logically, think about what to do or where to go, who to find. So I stood there like a deer in the headlights, having no idea where I was or where I'd be next, lighting another cigarette.

I squeezed my way out of the crowd and to the bar, lit up with neon signs and a small t.v. playing a football game. I didn't even remember how I'd gotten here or why, but James sat next to me, putting a hand on my lap. "You okay?" He asked, furrowing his brows.

"Yes," I blew out the smoke from the last drag, tapping the butt into the ashtray. "Thought I saw Kirk."

"Come on, come on..." He helped me up, throwing my arm around his shoulder and supporting me with his hand around my waist. My vision blurred and unblurred as lights flashed and waved, and we brushed against people. "Woah there you are not good, are you okay?" He asked to no avail, as I couldn't respond, my eyes closing and opening. "Fucking hell," He muttered.

He rushed me over to the bathroom, brushing off glares and protests by women seeing him in the bathroom and rushed me into the nearest stall. He helped my onto my knees and pulled my hair back out of my face, using his hand to hold it in a pony tail as the other rubbed my back. And boy did I hurl. He sat by me for 12 minutes as I threw up, comforting me and telling me it'll all be okay.

After I had nothing left in my system to possibly throw up, he helped me up and washed my face by the sink, taking off his jacket at putting it around my shoulders. "Let's go babe, c'mon it's been a long night."