COMPLETED Nellie Lovett (The Virgin Widow of Fleet Street) #Wattys2016 Sweenett

"After all this time?"

"Toby?" Benjamin sat down beside the kid who's doing his homeworks.
"French?" He asked.
"Yep Dad." He replied and focused on the notes again.
"Sleep beside your mum, kid." Toby looked up to him with confusion in his eyes.
"I'll be out to the sea tonight, sleep with mum. She can teach you French too, you know... Go there now." He combed his hair before he stood up and walked out of the room.

"Toby?" Nellie was surprised when she saw him cuddling his favorite pillow, a pen and a notebook in his hand as he waited for her to notice him in front of the door.
"Come here, love." She waved her hands inviting him in. Toby immediately jumped on the bed and kissed her huge tummy.
"Dad said I should sleep beside you tonight, mum. Can I, really?"
"Well, of course..." She embraced him and frowned. Where could he be at this time?
"He said he'd go out to the sea tonight, mum, can you help me with my French homework?"
"Y-yes, of course." She was smiling in front of her son, but something is piercing her heart. He shouldn't be out in the sea right now, he made a promise he won't leave her alone at night because of her delicate condition, and he didn't even tell her he's going out that night. He's avoiding her for real. He's been avoiding her since that night he turned away from her in the middle of lovemaking.

She helped Toby with his homeworks and read bedtime stories both to him and to the baby in her womb after until he fell asleep embracing her tummy. It's already near dawn and she still cannot sleep, she's thinking of Ben and what's happening to him...to them. It has only been two months since they married, she has yet to give birth to their baby and he has changed already. She only prayed he won't be Sweeney Todd again, the idea makes her tremble. He can't go back to embrace that man again, not after all this time that she spent trusting him with her and their baby's life, not after all this time that she'd finally allowed him in her heart.

She spent the next day feeling nauseous because of lack of sleep. She seldomly see her husband around the house, she saw him during lunch time but he barely said a thing to her. She just let him do his thing when he informed her he's going out to buy some groceries. He looked dreadful when he stared at her before going out. She spent the afternoon trying to at least nap for awhile but she can't, not with the memories of his dreadful eyes looking at her as if she's inflicting pain in his soul, not with her thoughts that his promises of love has already gone sour in just a few months, not with nonsense ideas that he feels disgusted of her. Nellie covered her face with her palms in frustration, she feels like crying. Benjamin had already managed to fix her emotions in the past months by just being with her, by just making her feel that she isn't alone, but now, everything is so blur again. Her emotions are turning upside down and much worse than before. She's becoming so paranoid, so insecure, so empty; all because he doesn't sleep with her.

Heavy footsteps were heard inside their room. Elle turned to see Ben going near their bed. She moved to the right side and invited him in.
"How was your day?" She asked him, searching for his eyes.
"Fine..." He replied simply. His eyes were dark again.
"You don't look fine..." She touched his face, he leaned on her hand for awhile before he fake a smile.
"I'm fine, Elle." His hand gently pushed her hand away from his face.
"Take a rest now." He smiled again and attempted to stand up, but her hand stopped him.
"Ben... What's happening?" She finally asked. He frowned as he looked at her.
"Nothing, love... Just go to sleep." He touched her face and stand up ready to leave her.
"You surely didn't marry me just to take responsibility of the child, did you?!" That's it. The thread of her patience is at its end and she exploded with different emotions.
"I should've asked Toby earlier to sleep with you." Ben told her which made her more furious. Toby was out to sleep in Mrs. Perez's house for a school project he has to finish with the elder woman's grandson.
"Well, you were late! I already said yes to him even before you can protest!"
"Elle... Please just go to sleep. This isn't good for the baby." He said patiently.
"And what do you know about what's good for the baby?! Making me feel alone? Making me feel unwanted?! Making me feel so... Ugly?!" Ben looked at her, tears were starting to form in her eyes.
"Elle, don't say that."
"Hah! What else can I say, Ben?! You are making me feel like it!"

In a swift motion, Benjamin grabbed her jaws and crushed his lips on her, making her groan through their lips. The kiss was so savage making her shake, but she responded to him as hungrily. He then suddenly held her hand and made her touch his hard front, it pulsed in her touch and she moaned.
"I can fuck you right now if that's what you really want, just to make you feel beautiful, wife." He whispered in her ear when he gave her air for awhile before he crushed his lips on hers again.
Nellie pushed him hard and slapped his face. His eyes remained dark, he wasn't even surprise that she hit him and that added more insult, more pain to her heart.
"Fuck me, you say?! Is that what you've been doing all this time?! Is that how low you see me as?!" Her voice keeps getting higher. Ben was just staring at her, his dreadful eyes were penetrating her soul.
"Do you really think this is just about sex?!" She slapped his face again and he didn't even flinch.
"I need you..." Her tears finally fell. She feels as if something sharp was planted in her heart because of how he's been treating her...because of what he just said.
"I didn't want you to make love to me every night, I just need you to be here...beside me and I don't know why!No matter how much I tell myself not to feel this way, I just can't." She wiped her tears that are falling like raindrops now.
"When I found out that I'm pregnant, I tried to convince myself that I can do this alone. But all this time, you have proved me wrong. You made me believe you can change, you made me believe you're still capable of love...at least for the baby."
"Elle..." He can feel the pain in her eyes. This isn't how he wanted it to turn out. He wanted her safe, he wanted her happy and now, seeing how her emotions exploded like a bomb because of his actions make him feel sick.
"You've taken away all my fears and insecurities only to ruthlessly inflict it back! Much worse!!!" She hit his chest.
"Elle!!!" He tried to stop her hands but she's gradually becoming hysterical.
"Elle, please stop it!" He imprisoned her inside his arms sobbing.
"It isn't like that Elle... It's not like that at all... Please calm down... Please...for the baby." he held her until she calms down.
"Tell me now..." She pushed his chest and looked him in the eye.
"Tell me now so I won't forget. So i can understand...so I can...Stop..." There was so much sadness in her eyes.
"Is it because of..."she swallowed.
"Lucy...?" For a long moment, Ben just stared at her. He can't even say a word. Looking at his guilty eyes trying to avoid her gaze added so much more pain to her heart.
"After all this time?" Elle asked, another couple of tear fell from her eyes.
Ben remained silent, he can't have any word to give her. Partly, it was because of Lucy. He cannot deny that and he cannot get any word out to explain anything as well.

"Get out..."she broke the silence.
"Elle." He reached for her, he wanted to explain but he felt as if something is blocked in his throat. He can't get himself to talk about Lucy, just hearing her name still makes him so guilty and so sad.
"Elle, it isn't"--- "Don't touch me!!!" She cried out loud and avoided his touch.
"Please Elle, it's not..." ---"I said don't touch me!!! Leave me alone!!!" Again she's starting to become hysterical. Benjamin stood up and stared at his wife for a longer time. Pain was plastered in her beautiful face. What had he done to her? He combed his fingers through his hair before he turned around and walked out of the door.
He was already on his way out of the room when he heard Elle groaned and gasped for air. He looked back again, her mouth opened as she held her stomach and groaned once again.
"Elle!!!" He ran towards her, fear claimed all his well being when he saw blood on her dress.
"Elle!!!" She began twisting in pain while crying, she can feel something severely painful right inside her womb, it felt as if something is being pulled out of her that she almost screamed. Then she trembled in fear as she raised her hand that unconsciously reached for her legs when she felt something hot flowed down from in between her thighs and stared at her palm now covered in blood...
"N-No..." She whispered and flinched as fear and pain enveloped her whole being.

(A/N the end of this story is getting nearer, tell me what you think! Share your opinions about Elle and Ben as well as my writing. Will it be a happy ending? Or will it be another heart-breaking love story? Well, share your thoughts now!

P.S. Thank you for 1k plus reads! Please favorite and comment too! :-)