A Lovers Mess

V

"You say that but then you look forward or to the side, you can't seem to just relax. You know that this is the only time on this day that you'll feel like this ever." Louis looks at Troye confused yet smiling.

"You get what I mean, I'm not good an English like you are. But why spend time thinking, you're in a car going 90 down the main highway of the city you live in...why waste this moment thinking?" Troye said, smiling at what seems to be the best thing he's said all year.

"Humans think Troye, it's just going to happen. Let me think idiot." Louis says, "Also keep your eyes on the road and stop looking at me, we'll crash."

"You are the definition of a buzzkill." Troye says, slamming his second hand on the steering wheel.

"I'm not a buzzkill, you just haven't seen me drunk." Louis says, smiling to himself.

"Well fuck, maybe I need to get you drunk then."

Fucking what?

Louis's mind ran wild. He was confused yet flustered. How was he supposed to feel after a bulked up seventeen-year-old designer just said he wants to get him drunk? Louis didn't mind being drunk, but it was fun occasionally. But drunk in front of Troye? That was nowhere near Louis's idea of 'Bestie Activities'.

"We're here, also you're thinking again. Is it about what I said?" said Troye smiling at his idea.

"I need more coffee and shut up." Louis said getting out of the car swiftly. There was this small coffee shop that sat on the corner of a busy street in the city, yet no one came here. The place had at most three others in it. Troye walked in front of Louis in a black knitted sweater with black ripped jeans and white shoes. The boys back faces Louis. His waist wasn't necessarily thin, but his should were broad and muscular. The caffe was just as cold as outside. A little cosier, however. They had candles lit that smelt of vanilla and pastries trapped behind a sheet of glass, still warm. 

"What do you want?" Troye turned and said to Louis while looking up at the handwritten menu boards.

"Uh you go first that's fine." Louis said to him still analysing the boards.

"Nah I want to know what you're getting." Troye said. "I'm unsure so I wanna know."

"Uh I'll get an iced long black with sugar syrup, and then an apple danish I think." Louis said, taking gaps in his words as he decided.

"Ok, ill order first." Troye said calmly leaving Louis blind to Troye ordering for him.

"That was rude." Louis says as Troye turns back around after paying. "Think I'm poor or something?"

"Just be pretty and grateful, that's all you had to do." Troye says as he sits at the bar stool of the table that Louis lay leaning against.

After collecting the two coffees and danish, the boys walked back to the car. It was 7:46 and school didn't start until 8:00. Troye was willing to waste gas because that what seem to make them both feel at peace. It's not the most ideal thing budget wise, but it seemed to work for the small period they had. In fact, it had felt like Troye had driven Louis miles, just because that's when he liked him the most. At peace in his passenger seat with his hair moving with the wind and his skin glowing against the sun.

Troye had been caught tup in this Wohlwend of emotion. He hadn't really felt like he had with Louis before, but he chose not to think about it. He knew that often it wasn't worth thinking about, more just letting it happen. It seemed that Troye had that aspect on life in general. Just let things roll over and see what happens. He took everything as a learning experience and was naturally calm. He took everything out with different fabrics. Troye was a night person, his messy and floppy dark curly hair and caramel skin in a white wife beater and sweatpants was a sight that his design room saw often. It would be two in the morning and Troye was only just getting started on something he would think up in a fever dream.

Louis was different though. He was a morning and day person. He picked every outfit he'd wear with thought and took a barista course for fun. He overthinks almost everything he did and continues to. It's always been the same and his sister could've vouched for that. He takes all the time in the world to do well in school and took everything almost a little to seriously. His house smells of Vanilla and caramel and is almost always slightly too cold. He likes warm white lighting or natural lighting only. But occasionally when his emotions would spill, like Troye, he would end up in his painting room with a loose paint covered shirt and sweatpants at some ridiculous hour in the morning. Sometimes not even sleeping as it wasn't a desire, it was a need. A need to spew these emotions without aggression or disruption of his already fragile mental state. It was easy, it was Louis's easy. And while Troyes' easy was different to his, they managed to make their own form of easy together. It had been six weeks since Troye had met Louis. But the past six weeks seemed to have make them both understand themselves more. For Louis that's always felt difficult, and he got used to difficult. Troye lost easy in alone. He thought alone was easy when it wasn't.

"You make life seem easy." Said Louis, his mind racing.

"Life should be easy, shouldn't it?" Troye said, turning his head from the road.

"I feel like that's just what people say. Like it's not that easy in the end." Louis said tilting his head back.

"Why should living be hard though?" Troye says, genuinely confused.

"It shouldn't be hard, it just...is." Said Louis as Troye parked in the school parking lot.

"Enough thinking shit, we have design and that's the subject I don't think in so shut up now." Troye said as he closed the car door, leaving Louis in the car.

"Fine, but you think in design, you make this weird face when you're sketching." Louis says following Troye into the building, slightly mimicking his facial expressions.

"Didn't I say for you to stop thinking, and to shush?" Troye says as he stands in the doorway of the hallway. 

"Whatever." Said Louis.