The Threesome (Harley Quinn X Male Reader X Poison Ivy)

Something Green

Ivy: Guys, you may not even know this but you're looking for any reason to disrupt my life with Kite Man. And I just... I cannot have it.

Harley: So what are you saying?

Ivy: I mean, I'm saying... (sighs) I'm saying I don't want neither of you to be here.

Harley sobs hanging her head, (Y/N) puts his arm around her shoulder.

(Y/N): (looking down) We'll go, just let Evie and Heather stay, they were looking forward to be flower girls.

He then walks away with Harley, both with their heads hung.

~Timeskip~

As they exit the room, they pass a practicing Clayface.

Clayface: Harley, (Y/N), are you leaving?

Harley: Yeah, I got duped by Two-Face. (as Jim walks over besides the door and sets a potted plant besides it) He told me Gordon was gonna be here but he's not. (he runs away) And I just look stupid and desperate in front of everyone as usual.

Clayface: Nonsense! We're at a wedding. The only person people are paying attention to is the bride... (chuckling) And hopefully, me!

Harley: (as Clayface starts practicing again; lookin' at the table where the she see's her name in the maid of honor seat) Maybe we don't fit in Ivy's new life.

Clayface: (as (Y/N) grabs one of the flowers; choking)Ugh, I need water.

~Timeskip~

As they exit the venue they sit by the fountain.

(Y/N): You know, I came here to give Ivy one final send off, maybe in my head I actually wanted something to play out, but If it's not meant, to be, we'll follow the same path.

Harley: (slightly giggling as he offers her the flower) You're telling me you wanna get married?

(Y/N): I mean, definitely not right now, but in the future.

Harley: (smiling she sniffs the flower only to smell plastic) Plastic?

The two look at each other and smile slightly before looking back at the venue with determination.

~Timeskip~

Inside the groom and bride are exchanging vows.

Kite-Man: Ivy, from the first moment I saw you, I knew I could never do better. And even though you rejected me over and over again and over again, for good measure, I was determined to share a life with you. You know, some might call it stalking... Ivy, I can't wait to spend the rest of my life with you in our modest, ranch-style, suburban home. Grilling meatless proteins, of course, and spending weekends shuttling our four kids (Ivy's smile slightly turns to shock) between soccer, ballet, karate and capoeira, which is this sick combination of ballet and karate. Spending Sunday dinners at my parents' house, as soon as they allow us back into their lives, of course. Um, and just a lot of chilling on the couch, binging some premium streaming content and looking at our phones. (as Harley walks, Jen makes her way towards her; we also see Sy in a screen monitor) No-judgment style. Ivy, you are the wind beneath my kite.

Jen: What the hell do you think you're doing?

Harley: Saving my best friend.

Ivy: Well, that was... a very specific picture that you painted of our future that I had not... (clearing her throat) I had not totally considered. (sighs) Oh, right, I'm up. Sorry. (checking her notes) Um, hello, uh, let me just check my notes... Right. (inhaling before coughing) Charles Kite Man Brown, I...