AMBITION - ERENXREADER

✧ 𝕥 𝕨 𝕖 𝕟 𝕥 𝕪- 𝕟 𝕚 𝕟 𝕖 ✧

"Nah, they can fight. I don't give a fuck," Eren dismissed. With that he turned his back on the whole scene, truly without a care of who hurt who. Hell, he wasn't even sure who he wanted to win, although he knew who would in a heartbeat. Sure, Hitch was the one who blabbed her mouth, but Mikasa was the one who armed her with the the words that poisoned everything.

Eren almost reached his bedroom door when he heard Jean and Annie interfere, pulling Mikasa off of the bloodied girl underneath her. That was the last thing he had heard or seen of the spectacle.

When he entered his room he was forced to face the reality of the situation. You had to have been long gone by then. Pissed off wasn't a strong enough phrase for how he felt, more like utterly furious at not only Hitch and Mikasa, but at himself for not pushing harder for Mikasa to tell you sooner. Furious at you for not trusting him the way he trusted you and expelling him so easily from your life.

Without a care of who was in his house or how long the party continued to rage on, he slipped under the covers on his bed, hoping to let exhaustion let him slip away into sleep and away from the madness that was real life. Yet all he could do was stare at the dark ceiling. The bass of the music bellowing throughout his house vibrated the walls, and his pillow wafted the faintest scent of your shampoo, leaving him all the more miserable.

"Fuck this," he grumbled to himself. There was no way he could sleep with the heaviness swelled in his chest, all while breathing in the smell of you.

After an hour of tossing and turning, Eren finally got back up and shuffled through his closet for an extra blanket. Once it was in his hands, he wrapped it around himself and laid against the rug on the floor. It was no where near as comfortable, but anything was better than the way your essence haunted him in his bed.

And then he cried. He pulled the blanket to his face and downright sobbed over his loss. Sobbed over his frustrations. Sobbed over what could have been. Sobbed until he fell asleep pathetic against the thumping floor of his bedroom, completely alone.

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𝕖𝕣𝕖𝕟'𝕤 𝕡𝕠𝕧 - 𝕟𝕖𝕨 𝕪𝕖𝕒𝕣'𝕤 𝕖𝕧𝕖

It had been a month since Eren had tasted your sweet lips, and if anything with each passing day his heart ached even more. Everyone kept telling him that time heals all wounds. Well that's bullshit. It had only been a month, sure, but time didn't seem to be healing shit. If anything it gave you another opportunity to rip his heart out once more, stomp on it, and throw it in the garbage like a piece of worthless trash.

You had crawled back to him a week prior begging for forgiveness, words tender and soft. And as much as every fiber of his being gave into you, his brain couldn't get on board. His reaction was nothing short of a defense mechanism, and he knew that. He had immediately regretted his words and actions the second you slammed your car door and drove off, far away from him once again.

Yet he chose to confine himself inside the tiny compartment of his brain that strove for self preservation, the small voice in his head that repeated to him over and over that he wasn't worthy to love or be loved. That you were too good for him anyways and that he deserved to be miserable for what felt like eternity if it meant not giving you the power to crush his entire being again.

Eren hadn't attended his friends' holiday get togethers or texted them back when they tried to check in on him. He avoided his family's endless questions about what was wrong when he drove to see his parents at their newer house for the holidays. They could tell something was off by the way Eren only added one word responses to conversation and avoided spending time with parents and Zeke. Zeke was annoyingly persistent, especially since he had met you right before Thanksgiving.