The Shadow

Chapter 18

Kai spent the rest of the day roaming the Ivory Manor's grounds, which were extensive. Harper showed him through a labyrinth of rose bushes, soft flowing streams and carved stone paths. The air smelled as sweet as honey, as if the beautiful red and white flowers had imprinted their scent upon the cool breeze itself. At the center of the maze stood a massive tree, enormous branches splayed out toward the sky as leaves blew to the rocky ground.

"My father used to pray here," Harper said, gesturing toward a stone bench that stood before the trunk of the tree. "I have never prayed to the gods, but if you would like to, you're welcome to come here anytime.

Kai shook his head. "Thank you, but... I would rather not believe in gods. I think...I think that I fear what they will do to me, if they do exist."

"My father believed that the gods would forgive him." Harper's voice was hardly a whisper as her black hair blew in the breeze. "He believed that they would not punish him for all the terrible things he did; all he had to do was apologize." She sighed. "I always thought it to be a stupid belief, one to help him sleep at night, but...maybe it's true. Maybe the gods—if they're out there—will forgive us. Still, I can't help but feel that I don't deserve that forgiveness, however merciful it might be. At least, not yet"

Kai nodded, recognizing the hollowness within his heart. "I felt good at the siege. I didn't enjoy the killing, but I knew that what I was doing was right." He turned to her, chest lightening. "These weeks in Ath... I feel like I've been making a step forward for the first time in a long while."

It was true. He craved the feeling that he had felt at the battle, hungered for it like he never had anything else.

"Don't you see?" she said. "That's why I have to fight, even if I'm hardly a contribution. I have to give something back, after what I've allowed my family to take."

What has her father done? Kai wondered. What has he done that makes you feel a debt toward humanity?

Harper smiled and pointed toward the trees looming over the Ivory Manor. "Come, I still haven't shown you the grove."

⥁⥁⥁⥁⥁⥁⥁⥁⥁⥁⥁⥁⥁⥁⥁⥁⥁⥁⥁⥁⥁⥁⥁⥁⥁⥁⥁⥁⥁⥁⥁⥁⥁⥁⥁⥁⥁

It was magnificent. In the past he had only seen the grove from a distance, and now that he walked among the trees, he wasn't sure that it could be called a grove. There were thousands of trees, stretching half a mile in every direction. They ranged from common beech and ash, draped in thick canopies of bright green leaves, to weeping willows with their foliage swinging in the breeze. Bushes and fallen leaves littered the ground like a rug, and trees sprouted from the ground every which way that he turned. He recognized the familiar plants that he had seen a few days before, leaves cut sharply into triangles—a shape so perfect that only nature itself could have achieved its precision.

"I've never seen anything like it," Kai said, pointing to a massive tree rooted near the neat stone path on which they stood. Its trunk alone was enormous, its circumference spanning at least eight meters. The canopy of the tree, however, was what really caught his attention. It seemed to go on forever, a thick mass of leaves and foliage stretching out in every direction. Vines sprung from the tree branches—no, roots. Or perhaps they were entire trees, all interconnected.

"The banyan tree," Harper said with a smile. "In truth, it may not have been a good idea to plant one here—they grow upon their other trees, and eventually kill them," she explained. "I don't regret growing them though; they're the most fascinating trees I've ever seen. My father found the seeds far from here. Their canopies are some of the largest in the world—at least, that's what I've read."

Kai shook his head in awe. The trees in Northshore had been common—magnificent, but not in the strange, unique way of the banyan. He had never thought that he would look at something like trees in such a way, but it truly was amazing. Since arriving at Ath, he had come to appreciate nature like he never had before—it seemed more alive, somehow, than a bustling city. Or did he feel more alive? Had breaking the bonds from his old home released something inside of him?

"Hurry." Harper grabbed his arm, pulling him along the rocky path, through twists and turns. "There's so much left to see."

Kai simply watched and listened as she led him through the woods, taking upon the role of narrating everything that they passed. "These stones were taken from the ruins of Marshwood Keep." She pointed toward several massive, worn stones that stood neatly beside a bend in the path. Kai winced, shrugging, and she sighed.

"You've really never heard of Marshwood Keep?" she shook her head, feigning disappointment even as excitement gleamed in her eyes. "It used to stand in the center of Bralyne, in Obrith—before the entire city was sacked, of course. They say it was the largest city in history—twice the size of Terrin. That was hundreds of years ago, of course."

"Of course," Kai said, nodding thoughtfully. Harper glared at him.

"Have you ever picked up a history book? Obrith is south of here—Bralyne was the continent's capital, before it was turned to rubble."

Kai had never heard of Obrith, let alone Bralyne. How big was the world, he wondered? If he had never heard of an entire continent, how much else was out there that he had never dreamed existed? Harper had moved on to a small tree with ruby red leaves.

"These cost a fortune," she said, running a leaf gently through her finger, as if it were as delicate and costly as fine silks. Well, he supposed that they probably were. He ran a finger along one of the leaves, marveling at the downy hairs that covered it.

"Why has your family created this place?"

She shrugged, leaving the ruby tree to lead him further along the path. "My father collected them on his travels. They were like souvenirs, I guess, to remind him of the places he's been." She smiled. "Hopefully I can expand this place someday."

Kai found himself smiling back. It was refreshing, seeing Harper this way. Happy. Natural. Not worried about being eaten alive. He supposed that he was happy, too. He had found what he was looking for in Ath. Peace, comfort, a refuge from his past. And yet...something was missing. Something vital. He felt a hole inside of him, but couldn't figure out what was meant to fill it. Hadn't he done enough? Hadn't he fought enough battles, saved enough lives?

No. No, I haven't. I killed innocent people for most of my life, of course I haven't done enough. I'm not sure that I ever will, but...but is that such a bad thing?

I felt truly happy during the siege, felt purpose. The hole inside of me was filled in those moments, as I fought for the city, for the men and women and children inside it. That's what I'm missing. That wonderful feeling of doing good for once in my life.

I will find that feeling again.